He wipes at my other arm, cleaning the blood away so that all that remains is my smooth skin, decorated with faint pink lines that are already vanishing. Then he tosses the rag into a trash bin and he pulls me to my feet and out the door. But I can feel it now: his fear. He fears I’ve done something wrong.

And so do I.

Chapter 19

“Feeling better?” he asks me.

I nod, setting the cup on the table.

We’re out in the main room, the one everyone crowds. When we first came in, I endured a lot of stares. Aiden says it’s because I’m new and they’ll get over it eventually.

“You know we all saw things we didn’t to want see,” Aiden calls to me over the crowd.

I nod, taking a sip of the cherry red drink that tastes sweeter than anything else that’s ever touched my lips.

“But you’ll get over it and learn to move on,” he adds and then pauses. “Do you want to talk about it?”

I shake my head, staring into my cup. “Why did I scratch my arms like that?”

“I don’t know.” And he really doesn’t. “But don’t worry. It’ll get easier. Everything does.”

I give him a fake smile from across the table.

“Don’t do that.” He frowns. “Don’t put up a wall.”

“I’m not.” I lie.

Abruptly, he’s on his feet and leading me to a dark corner, away from the ears of everyone.

“Are you sure you want to talk about it?” he asks softly. “Maybe I can help you deal with it.”

“You could help by telling me some things about me,” I suggest, not wanting to taste the potent taste of the clear liquid ever again.

He shakes his head, his dark bangs falling into his eyes. “If I did, then you might not remember things at all. It’s how it works. If I tell you stuff that I know it could interfere with the things you know.”

“Oh.” I frown at my cup.

“Kayla,” he says. “Whatever you saw—no matter how bad it is—there’s still good things. I promise.” His honey eyes sparkle in the faint light. He leans in, his lips so close and his breath tickles my ear. “I can’t talk about it with you, but can I suggest that maybe next time you should be thinking of me before you go under.”

I lean back, exploring his eyes, wondering just how good of friends we were back inside The Colony.

“It’ll get better.” He winks at me. “Juniper.”

The sound of my nickname rolling off his tongue causes my body to shiver. “Do I frighten you?”

His expression twists in confusion. “What?”

My grip tightens around the cup. “Do you ever think I’ll hurt you?”