‘Sir, you might drink this, but for us  .’ said Natwarlal, removing his shirt halfway to the toilet. The officer fell silent. It was a stale joke, unworthy of a reaction. But he was concerned that Natwarlal was systematically overstepping his limits. He made a mental note of it. This was the fourth time since Natwarlal had arrived a few months ago. Two and a half of the infractions had occurred in the past two hours. Natwarlal’s snide remarks on urine and cow dung were unpardonable. They were in an office and an office had hierarchies. So what if Hinduism was under reformation or Bombay was in the midst of a renaissance.

6

When Mapel Jones entered, Thompson straightened his collar. His feet returned to the floor. Mapel Jones led the Ladies’ Association for the Promotion of Female Education Amongst the Heathens, a Presbyterian Mission in Byculla.

‘Our very own Professor Duff has brilliantly characterized the orthodoxy of the Brahmins. The spread of the Gospel will bring in a revolution,’ she said.

‘I read his essay.’ Why does she speak so affectedly?

‘He talked about an encounter between a Brahmin and a priest. It seems that the Brahmins are always looking for an opportunity to argue with our missionaries. Not just that, they will contradict everything anyone tells them  . One of our missionaries was on the banks of the Ganges, you know the sacred river where they dispose of their dead. He was talking to a large crowd. Halfway through the sermon, a Brahmin—in the usual disruptive way they foil any attempts to teach the heathens—stood up. The reverend was graceful. The Brahmin asked, quite sarcastically, “Does the devil make man sin?”

The wise reverend said “Yes.”

To that the Brahmin responded, cheekily, “In that case, the devil is at fault. Why should the man be punished?”

The quick-witted reverend, aware where he stood, said, “Dearest Brahmin, do you see the boat on the other side of the river?”

“Yes.”

“If I were to send my friend to kill everybody on that boat and return with the spoils, who should suffer the punishment for the wicked act?”

“Both of you,” the Brahmin responded, with no grace.

“If you and the devil sin together, you and the devil will be punished together,” the reverend said. The Brahmin lost face and walked away.’

‘I know from my own experience that the Brahmin influence cannot be eradicated easily. Professor Hitchens says the Brahmins were among the earliest inhabitants of the region.’