She turned and ran down the steps, and got into the car beside her father. Waving as she sped away down the drive, her emotions were a jumble of pain, anxiety and excitement. But as she left Raphael at the departure gate in the airport, the agony was almost unbearable, grasping her by the throat so that she was barely able to breathe.

‘Dad – are you sure you’re all right?’ He looked unsteady on his feet, and she noticed that his trousers were gathered and held up by a broad belt, in an effort to disguise the weight he had lost. Taking her suitcase out of the car had cost him all his energy, and it was minutes before he could breathe normally. Sarah clung to him, suddenly fearful that she might never see him again. ‘I can still change my mind. Come back with you. If you want—’

He pushed her firmly towards the gate. ‘Don’t be getting cold feet now, child,’ he said. ‘I’m looking forward to my new adventure, as you must look forward to yours. Don’t even think of backing out. We’ll see you again soon, my darling, and we’ll write often. Go away now, and be happy. Go.’

She showed her boarding pass, and went into the departure area. Looking back, she could see her father standing there, waiting for a final glimpse of her, puffing hard on his pipe to hide his distress. With one last gesture of love she turned and walked away from him and was swallowed up in the crowd of passengers making for the plane.

Chapter 17

London, October 1965

Camilla was angry, unable to accept the lie in which she had been trapped, the bitter masquerade that was their futile marriage. They had been in a position to choose, while she had been given no options at all. It was impossible to fathom how or why they could have added a child to the torment of their existence together, and it crossed her mind that George might not be her father at all. She resented them for making her an unwitting victim of their unhappiness. It was plain that her father must have lived a secret life all through her childhood years, fearful of the possibility that his homosexuality would be discovered, that it would destroy his career, put him in prison even. Their shared secret had poisoned the home they inhabited, and allowed Marina’s isolation and unhappiness to grow like a cancer, and to distort all their lives.