I’m used to casual and meaningless. Easy and fast. But this? This is anything but. It’s intimate and beautiful. Deliberate and monumental.

With a curve of his lips and dip of his tongue, Jasper exposes a piece of myself that I’ve been fighting for years to keep hidden. Laid out beneath him, I feel something I’ve never felt before. For once, I’m not worried about what’s coming next or how to protect myself from the pain tomorrow might bring. In this moment, I can accept that things are good and for the first time in a really long time, I’m safe.

Jasper slides his arms beneath the back of my thighs, wrapping his hands around them, spreading me open.

“Eyes on me, Drew,” he rasps, his voice deep and thick, before his mouth is between my legs.

I do as he says, our eyes locked together as Jasper watches. He toys with me. Switching between fast and slow, gentle and hard, until it doesn’t matter anymore.

“Jasper.” His name is a moan and no matter how hard I try to keep them open, my eyes flutter shut.

Pressure begins to build low in my belly and anticipation tingles up my spine. The sound of my breathing melds with my mews of pleasure as my back arches off the bed, as the sensation builds and builds until it finally explodes. The black behind my eyelids turns fuzzy and my lungs freeze, trapping my scream in the back of my throat as remnants of my orgasm ricochet until every nerve ending in my body is lit up.

Jasper never loosens his grip on me. He holds me tight, eating me as he draws out every last tremor until my body goes limp.

“Please tell me you have a condom,” I whisper when my breathing begins to slow.

The light is still on . . . another first for me, and I get a perfect view when his eyes simultaneously soften and heat as he slides his hand into his pocket and pulls out his wallet.

I narrow my eyes in his direction. “You’re still wearing pants?”

“I don’t know if you noticed or not”—his smirk deepens and it makes my insides tighten—“but I was a little preoccupied.”

Oh.

I noticed.

My cheeks heat, but not from embarrassment. Even though it just ended, I need more. His mouth was great . . . wonderful. But now I need to feel him inside me.

And I need it now.

He’s taking his time, pulling the condom out of his wallet, but I can’t wait any longer. I snatch the wrapper from his hand and tear it open with my teeth.