Dedication

To the forgotten dreamer within you who found these pages⁠⁠—

They told you to "be realistic," but your wild heart was never meant for ordinary. Dream louder, laugh till it hurts, and chase the life that makes your pulse race, not just the one that pays the bills.

* * *

And to my mum, who waited fifteen years to hold this book in her hands. Thank you for never letting that little dreamer inside me give up.

A NOTE TO READERS

This novel contains themes and content that may be distressing to some readers. These elements are integral to the story and are approached with care, but reader discretion is advised.

Sensitive Content Includes:

• Childhood trauma and domestic abuse (Chapters 15, 32, 51)

• Substance abuse and addiction (Chapters 30, 74)

• Sexual assault and its emotional aftermath (Chapter 25)

• Grief and loss of a parent (Chapter 1 & throughout)

• Verbal and physical altercations (Chapter 66)

• Open door intimate scenes (Chapters 48, 52, 57)

• Mental health struggles, including anxiety and depression (throughout)

If you find these subjects triggering, please prioritize your well-being and proceed with caution. The author has endeavored to address these themes with sensitivity and authenticity.

WELCOME TO EDEN MIXTAPE

Music has always been the heartbeat of my creative process. This playlist has been my lifeline through endless drafts, 4AM writing sessions, and moments of pure creative magic. Each song has fingerprints all over Eden's story. Though most tracks weren't playing on radios in the 2000s when our characters were living their lives, somehow they captured exactly what I needed to feel.

PROLOGUE

There are moments that atomize a person—scattering them so wide that gathering the pieces seems like capturing starlight with bare hands.

Seconds. That’s all it takes.

One choice. One cosmic blink, and certainty dissolves into smoke.

Time doesn't just break—it fractures completely.

Before stands forever separated from after, the boundary marked not by a gentle line but by a jagged barrier of broken glass and scattered memories.

When death arrives, it brings no patience for bargaining. It watches the raw, animal desperation of someone seeing their future burn. Death only laughs—cold and ancient—reminding that each heartbeat was merely borrowed, asking with cruel interest: What did you do with my generous loan?

It’s where the realization hits you: life isn't possessed but temporarily held, like a library book with its due date written in vanishing ink. No one belongs to another forever. The universe simply allows brief custody, its permission already fading as it's granted.

These are the moments that transform. That demolish and reconstruct something entirely different—something permanently marked by the knowledge that everything changes between inhale and exhale.

Seconds. That’s all it takes.

Blink.

Gone.

Only darkness remains, with echoes of words forever unspoken.

1. The Summer Before Seventeen

CHAPTER 1

THE SUMMER BEFORE SEVENTEEN

NORA

June 2006

15 years old

Breathe.

Just breathe.