“I didn’t clock out on Friday.”
“What do you mean, you didn’t clock out? You weren’t even here.”
“Well, Linda, that’s the truth in theory. But in actuality, I’m afraid it’s not.”
“I don’t get it.”
I explained to her what I’d been doing.
“You sly son of a bitch, you. That’s one of the greatest things I’ve ever heard.”
“Thank you, thank you. Now what the hell do I do?”
She shook her head, then shrugged. “Not much you can do, really. If I were you, I’d tear up your card and say it was missing when you arrived this morning. Cathy will give you the thirty-two hours you worked last week, sans overtime.”
“But that means I’m going to lose like a hundred bucks.”
“For as long as you’ve been doing your little trick, I think you’re still coming out ahead.”
“Ugh.” I ripped up both cards, buried them in the bottom of my trash bin, and clocked in with a new card.
“So how was the rest of your night with Gene?” I asked.
“It was good,” she said, keeping her back to me.
“That’s great. Gene’s an awesome guy. I might have hanged myself by now if it weren’t for him.”
“Yeah, we had a nice time.”
She turned in her chair and realized I was grinning at her like a swindler.
“You know, don’t you?”
“Not because he told me,” I said, and then explained what had happened Saturday morning, when Gene wouldn’t let me in, and how I’d heard the shower turn off.
“Damn,” she said.
“Ahh, Linda, after all we’ve been through. I’m hurt you would try to hide such a thing. And here I thought you and I were the real deal.”
“Yeah, yeah. I would have told you. Just might have given it a day or two.”
“I don’t know if I believe you, but I think it’s awesome all the same.”
She nodded but remained silent. I wanted to know more.
“So are you going to see him again?”
“Tomorrow night for dinner.”
“Hot damn! My man, Gene, and my darling, Linda,” I said. “Well, was he at least able to hold an erection? I know you had voiced concern for that at one point.”
She rolled her eyes like a teenager. “Yes, he did quite well. Now quit asking me stupid questions.”