My phone keeps ringing fuck that guy maybe I WILL just give up 30 grand in commish today.

Well I know where I’m goin I know straight where I’m going I’m going over to Delaware options where they have the CLIPBOARD. If you are in the know you know about the CLIPBOARD. Well I am in the know because it was MY IDEA MOTHERFUCKER. So I took the top side of a box and put a clipboard on top of it with a bunch of buy and sell tickets, and the dudes in the LMM can use the buy and sell tickets, see, but that’s not the primary purpose. The primary purpose is to store blow underneath the box top all lined up in pretty little lines. And there are enough people in the know around the LMM that anyone can just bend over and get a good sniff right in the middle of the day the whole thing is GENIUS you can see why I am good at my job. Sometimes I fill it with my blow actually most of the time but I’m betting someone else stocked it because I got in late and sure enough those motherfuckers are getting a good LAUGH at me because I walk in the LMM with my nose practically dragging on the floor. Well, I don’t give a FUCK today man so I take my time and really let one rip and then let another one rip and we usually try to keep it quiet but I am making a big scene about honking the stuff and LAUGHS ALL AROUND. I’m sure there is some grommet that saw the whole scene but no fuckin cares today MAN. For all I know this might be my list SNIFF.

My phone’s ringin. Mother fuck that guy.

“What up, bra?”

“Hey man, I’ve been trying to get a hold of you.”

“Sorry my friend, my mistake. How many did I miss?”

“You missed none. I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for this 3COM thing.”

“Three what?”

“The spinoff. 3COM is spinning off PALM in about a half an hour. I need you to look sharp.”

Oh Jesus. It’s a good thing I didn’t die on my shag fuckin carpet last night. I’m going to make some serious coin today. These kids have been talking about this trade for WEEKS.

Well, I didn’t go to school but I sort of know how this shit works sort of. So 3Com makes these Palm Pilot things (which I refuse to own, too much evidence stored in one place) and they are making a SHITLOAD of money off of them so I guess they want to spin it off so they can get a bunch of cash and this is the part I am unclear on so they are going to basically IPO the thing. PALM that is. So you know what is going to happen, all these day trader MOOKS are going to RIPPPPPP PALM and all the floor trader mooks are going to try and short it. Some part of what’s left of my tiny brain says there’s probably a better trade but I DON’T KNOW WHAT IT IS. Fuckface probably knows what it is. Someone is going to be wearing it in about a half hour.