I’ve got some ideas. But since I’m not a scientist with any experimental evidence to back me up—though Yusuf cracked himself up with “Which means now you should publish a paper on the topic and try to get it cited”—you have to bear with me.

What if the footage we’d seen of Figueiredo’s universe were not recordings of the past, like we figured. Maybe they were future predictions or simulations from the Envisioner. Or maybe the past isn’t as solid as we think.

What if certain events between our universes are linked? Entangled—I might want to borrow and completely oversimplify a fancy physics topic while Yusuf looks on patiently and decides whether he should correct me or just let me run with this until I get too confused or bored. What if it was never set in stone who would die during the parallel attacks on our parallel Compounds? Just that Yusuf or Tiago had to, for whatever reason. For balance, even with Figueiredo and me flipping off the multiverse and pushing our thumbs on the scales every now and then. When I saved Yusuf, I unintentionally dropped the guillotine on Tiago, but the net outcome between the two of them was the same.

Like our universes were each one side of the same coin. Heads or tails, whose love is going to die?

*   *   *

I’m going to fast-forward a few days of self-doubt and creeping out of bed to look at my hands and stare at myself in the mirror of the dim bathroom. Wondering what I was becoming while cold anxiety sweat dripped from my armpits. We’re short on time.

Kaori found out that the militia had kidnapped and tortured a junior staff member on weekend leave until he’d coughed up the location of the Compound, and then the militarized mouth-breathers had used the evacuation tunnels to barge through the gates. All off-Compound leave was canceled. Goodbye, margarita club.

She, of course, knew the militia was coming and left the back gate open for them. Knocking all the pieces into place so I would connect with the Envisioner and she could test if her experiment worked, but I’m getting ahead of myself. Please see previous notes re: Kaori pulling all the strings.

I waited two days to tell Yusuf. I couldn’t avoid him because it would’ve been too selfish after he literally killed a man to save us. But I knew I wasn’t myself around him until we were sitting on his bed by the open window, and I was running my thumbs along his palms.

“Hayes,” he began slowly, and with the way he knit his brows together I could tell he was trying hard not to offend me. “We both saw the footage from Figueiredo’s riot and saw that his husband died. That’s what’s always happened.”