Back 500 Miles from You Save as PDF
Chapters (94)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Epigraph
  4. Part I
  5. Chapter 1
  6. Chapter 2
  7. Chapter 3
  8. Chapter 4
  9. Chapter 5
  10. Chapter 6
  11. Chapter 7
  12. Chapter 8
  13. Chapter 9
  14. Chapter 10
  15. Chapter 11
  16. Chapter 12
  17. Chapter 13
  18. Chapter 14
  19. Chapter 15
  20. Chapter 16
  21. Part II
  22. Chapter 17
  23. Chapter 18
  24. Chapter 19
  25. Chapter 20
  26. Chapter 21
  27. Chapter 22
  28. Chapter 23
  29. Chapter 24
  30. Chapter 25
  31. Chapter 26
  32. Chapter 27
  33. Chapter 28
  34. Chapter 29
  35. Chapter 30
  36. Chapter 31
  37. Chapter 32
  38. Chapter 33
  39. Chapter 34
  40. Chapter 35
  41. Chapter 36
  42. Chapter 37
  43. Chapter 38
  44. Chapter 39
  45. Part III
  46. Chapter 40
  47. Chapter 41
  48. Chapter 42
  49. Chapter 43
  50. Chapter 44
  51. Chapter 45
  52. Chapter 46
  53. Chapter 47
  54. Chapter 48
  55. Chapter 49
  56. Chapter 50
  57. Chapter 51
  58. Chapter 52
  59. Chapter 53
  60. Chapter 54
  61. Chapter 55
  62. Chapter 56
  63. Chapter 57
  64. Chapter 58
  65. Chapter 59
  66. Chapter 60
  67. Chapter 61
  68. Chapter 62
  69. Chapter 63
  70. Chapter 64
  71. Chapter 65
  72. Chapter 66
  73. Chapter 67
  74. Chapter 68
  75. Chapter 69
  76. Chapter 70
  77. Chapter 71
  78. Chapter 72
  79. Chapter 73
  80. Chapter 74
  81. Chapter 75
  82. Chapter 76
  83. Chapter 77
  84. Chapter 78
  85. Chapter 79
  86. Chapter 80
  87. Chapter 81
  88. Chapter 82
  89. Chapter 83
  90. Chapter 84
  91. Acknowledgments
  92. About the Author
  93. Also by Jenny Colgan
  94. About the Publisher

“Before we start, I meant to tell you, turn off your social,” said Anita, who was speaking fast and eating with chopsticks. Lissa watched her hands, fascinated.

“What?” said Lissa. “What’s that got to do with PTSD?”

“What have anxiety-creating engines designed to distract, enervate, and worry you got to do with your mental health?”

Lissa frowned. There was a cough on the other side of the computer screen.

“I know,” said Anita, but not to Lissa. The forlorn cough came again. “Sorry,” said Anita quickly. “I had to keep her home from school.”

“I’m sorry about that,” said Lissa.

“Iz fine,” came a small voice, followed by another racking cough.

“She’s not fine. She just wants to watch Frozen again.”

“Maybe you’ll start telling your clients to build a snowman,” said Lissa, and the two women smiled briefly at each other.

“Have you got the trial date yet?” asked Anita.

“No. It’ll be ages away.”

“It probably won’t,” said Anita. “They fast-track these things, particularly with young lads.”

Lissa sighed.

“So you’re going to have to be ready,” said Anita unnecessarily. “If you can’t stand up and tell your story, there might be a mistrial. The perpetrator might be freed. There might be no justice.”

Lissa’s heart sank again. “Why does that mean I have to give up my social media?”

“Are you on it a lot?”

Lissa glanced at her phone. Kim-Ange appeared to be wearing a bowl of fruit on her head. “That depends how you define a lot.”

“It’s going to really impact your recovery,” said Anita, slurping. The coughing began again.

“How?”

“It’s making you ill. It’s making everyone ill with jealousy and self-doubt, and you are particularly vulnerable and in danger from it.”

Lissa looked at Anita. She had a large splotch of curry sauce on her cheek, but her expression was serious.

“But I’m out here all alone, and then I’ll be even more alone.”

“Good,” said Anita. “Use your inner resources. Stop trying to distract yourself with tiny pictures and other people’s lives. You’re distracting yourself from things you ought to be owning up to.”

Lissa was biting her lip.

“Feel,” said Anita. “You have to feel what you need to feel. Not distract yourself every five seconds. Not be constantly waiting for pings and swipes and likes and enervating yourself. Trust me, Lissa. You are already enervated. You need to get ready to tell this story and you have only four more sessions. Embrace the way you . . . oh.”

“What?” said Lissa, but there was no need. Loud and painful sounds of vomiting were coming off-screen.

“Not . . . not on the files!” Anita screamed as she jumped up.