The Yokai can hear them all laughing at her in the distance, congratulating their comrade, over the sound of her own lamentation. She holds a hand to the burning spot on her face and feels blood oozing from the corner of her mouth, wet and thick like paint. When she tries to feel around her mouth with her tongue, she gags on something sharp. The Yokai coughs, and coughs, and with a cautious hand, she slowly guides a long, sharp sliver out of her mouth. There are more inside, a spiky network of pins and needles that seem to be growing as she removes another and another. She is afraid to speak, let alone swallow, whimpering as she takes out each one. She lets out a fresh sob once they are all gone, sitting in a pile in the grass at her knees.

Careful not to disturb the small mountain of spiky metal, she crawls away. Her hand plunges into something wet. Water. The moonlight returns. A small pond stretches out in front of her. She crawls into it, hoping the cold water will soothe her. It is not enough. Each gaping hole on her arms and legs still burns like acid. She sits in the water and hugs her knees to her chest. More than anything she tries not to look at her reflection in the water. The reflection of a monster, the monster that everyone else sees: skin dark as a shadow, grotesque bulging eyes, swollen lips encircling a mouth ready to devour and maul the innocent, and scars, scars everywhere. A patchwork of hate.

“I just wanted to go home,” she whispers. She is grateful that this time there is no one around to reply.

five

POOLS OF TEARS

覆水盆に返らず

There is no use crying over spilled milk

“Ima okina-EE-to, okurema-SOO, yo … Ima okina-EE-to, okurema-SOO, yo …”

TGIS: Thank God it’s Saturday — the longest time until I have to go back to Zozo. I just need to keep breathing until then.

As I put on my skirt suit and butter up a slice of Texas toast, I almost look forward to this networking party tonight. I’m in a good mood for once. It also occurs to me that I haven’t been eating as much as I ought to, staring down the Kraft Dinner I just made for lunch. Zozo doesn’t have a fridge or a microwave, but it’ll keep warm in my bento box until twelve. After this, I’ll make it a point to eat healthier.