I scrambled to rescue it, and as I gave him his, I bent and quickly kissed his cheek. He did not acknowledge it, but lowered his head over his bowl, and ate in silence. Later, when we lay on opposite sides of the fire, wrapped in our sleeping furs, he said, “Elsha, it is a custom among the Chosen, that when a person has a birthday he is given gifts. In four days, you will be seventeen. Out of all my wealth, out of all at Kasimarra, what would you want? Name anything.”

“Nothing, lord. Thank you.”

“Nothing? All my other handmaids asked all the time for gifts – for fine garments, for jewels, for shoes and houses and silverware. In all the year you’ve been with me, you have never asked me for a single thing Think, Elsha There must be something you desire.”

“Can I have anything?”

“Anything you want.”

“I want the Quelled to work only until morning’s end every day, and in the afternoons their time is for themselves, and for rest. I want children under fourteen years forbidden to enter the mines. I want Quelled women to be permitted to choose their own husbands. I want branding abolished.”

I stopped for breath, and he asked, sounding amused, “Is that all, Elsha, or are you just warming up?”

“I’m sorry, lord. I thought you were serious.”

“And so I was. Consider it all done.”

“Thank you, lord. You could do no greater thing for me.”

“You’ll think of something else, I’m sure.”

He laughed softly, and I smiled to myself and rolled onto my side, pulling the furs up over my ears. The wind whistled in our cave entrance, and the smoke swirled. In the back of the cave the donkey stamped, restless, and Kallai hopped sideways on his makeshift perch. I lifted my head and looked through the flames at the Firelord. He lay on his back, peaceful, his pain gone for the moment. His white hair streamed across his dark furs, and shone in the firelight.

“It is your birthday, too, soon,” I said. “What would you like me to give you, lord?”

“A smile, Elsha, and a Quelled myth-song.”

“Consider that done, also.”

“I had not finished, woman. I want you to sing it in the temple at Kasimarra, while we tear down that abominable curtain.”

I was silent then, in my joy.

As the night closed in around our cave and the wind subsided, in the dying fire I saw the flames at Kasimarra, and a better world beginning.

17 Pain, Love and Destiny

17

Pain, Love and Destiny