But tonight? Tonight feels different. I feel different.

Hell, up until now, I haven’t even thought about Zayne all day.

And honestly, who knows when the next opportunity will even arise? Shiloh’s not exactly thriving with guys looking to get dicked down, from what I’ve gathered.

I snort at the thought.

“What are you doing after this?” Matt asks, pulling me out of my thoughts.

Fuck it. Maybe I can do this. Maybe I’m finally ready.

“Well,” I say, “if nothing comes up, I’ll probably just hang around here with the guys.”

He scratches his smooth jaw and smiles none-too-innocently. “Something came up.”

I grin and I’m just about to open my mouth to respond, when a sharp, biting voice cuts me off before I can even take a breath.

“Yo.”

Turning, I come face to face with a particularly irate Waylon. Cheeks flushed and rigid, I can practically hear the grind of his molars behind his tightly held jaw.

I raise a brow, wondering what the hell I did wrong now. “Yes?”

“We’re not paying you to flirt.”

I rear back at that, and a fresh wave of anger washes through me, reigniting the storm of emotions that has been brewing steadily since this morning.

Sure, I was more shocked than anything at first. Not because we almost kissed or that he pushed me, but for letting my guard down in the first place.

Hell, forget what happened when we were kids. I know better now. I learned that lesson hard and swift my sophomore year of high school when I accidentally stared too long at a defensive tackle in the locker room.

Nothing like a busted nose to remind you there is harm in looking, as innocent as it might be.

On the bright side, it never happened again. Not only did one of my closest friends and teammate at the time instantly throw down for me, effectively passing on the message that I would not be fucked with, but it taught me to keep my head down. To be mindful of my actions and how others might misconstrue them.

To not stare at someone’s shitty back tattoo, no matter what.

It’s not fair and it’s not right, but it’s reality. My reality. And I never again forgot that.

Until this morning.

Because something shifted inside me on that bridge. For the first time, I wanted to tell someone about what happened with Zayne. Give voice to the moment that blew my world apart.

And not just anyone. I wanted to tell Waylon.