They’d climbed up the famous castle on the northwest coast, the Angelokastro, and then dipped into the sea. She’d skipped down the caramel sand to their knapsacks and said, Let me take a picture of you, Winn. Joey thought about it now, that maybe she’d wanted to capture him completely, in a way she wasn’t allowed to do to a person, or supposed to. Leo had stopped in the break of a wave, facing her straight-on. There was something so vulnerable about that, Joey felt, hair slicked back, eyes blinking salt, everything you try to be or think you are scraped away. Leo didn’t smile, but it was always his eyes that held all of him. His eyes were content.

Now Leo’s eyes were unreadable. “Can I hold you, Jones? I know I shouldn’t be allowed to, but—”

“Yes.” She blinked back tears, feeling the bed shift as Leo got behind her to be the big spoon. He plucked the fluorescent-green tee she’d migrated into after discovering it crumpled in her covers.

“This is a horrible shirt, Jones, but somehow you still look cute in it.” When she didn’t respond, his arms tightened around her. “I’m so sorry. I’m sorrier than you will ever know, J.”

“My grandfather survived Auschwitz. He was one of my favorite people in the world.”

Leo stroked her hair. “I’m so sorry, Jonesey. God, I…well…I have terrible timing.”

Leo held her as she shook, and Joey imagined that Leo’s arms were stitched together with her inside and he could never move them, not ever.

*  *  *

That evening, Leo helped carry all their suitcases to the curb. Even though the sun had gone, Joey put her sunglasses on. The taxi pulled up.

Leo’s eyes were focused on her, like willing her to be normal and okay because he needed her to be. “I love you, Jonesey. I know you don’t believe me, but I really do love you.”

Joey just nodded, not trusting herself to speak.

“Bye, little L.” Leo knelt down to hug her little sister. “I love you too.” Then he whispered quietly to Lily, “Don’t forget me, okay?”

There were more goodbyes. Rand and Maisy and words and more words. Then Leo, again, hands on Joey’s waist. Even though she didn’t want to, Joey tilted forward like a plant to the sun.

“You’re amazing, Jonesey. You’re the most amazing girl I know. Be happy, okay? Be really happy. You’ll find some other guy who adores you. I know you will. And you’ll forget me.” His voice broke, like he was genuinely heartbroken at the thought. But then why was he doing this?

Joey wedged her cheek into Leo’s neck. “I wish I could forget you. I really wish I could.”

Chapter Sixteen

Joey

Florida
2019