True, he’d never been a part of any group, and he doubted he’d be friends with most of them afterward. But Shen and Barney probably didn’t feel any more connection with the others than Tom did, and yet they were still doing everything they could to help, to make that difference.

Seeing how much it meant to Shen, that he’d tried to save Freddie and lost him, made Tom feel like less of a person. Whether he’d wanted to be on this trip or not, he was here. He was the little boy he’d once imagined, being in the right place at the right time to save someone. He was here.

He looked at them and said, “I’m not leaving anyone else behind, not if I can help it. I’m sick of blaming Joel.”

Still looking dejected, Shen said, “It’s the right thing to aim for. I just don’t know if we can do it.”

“Tom can do it,” said Barney.

Shen looked at him and nodded with what looked like unconditional acceptance.

And Tom immediately regretted what he’d said, because he knew that Shen had been right and Barney was wrong. Tom could try to keep everyone alive, and maybe it was the right approach to take, but he also knew that someone else would surely die. It was the nature of this environment. Someone else would die, no matter what Tom tried to do to stop that happening—it was really just a question of who and how and when.

CHAPTER 23

Jess stayed by the luggage container on the slope, remaining there even after darkness fell. There were questions about whether it was safe, but they decided that it was close enough to the fire to protect her from wild animals.

Their decision made little difference anyway because she wouldn’t be moved. Nor did she eat, and only took a drink at the third attempt. But her half-presence and the loss of Freddie weighed heavily on the camp through the evening, the mood subdued.

Perhaps people were thinking about the next day too, though no one asked questions or asked if there was anything they needed to do. The bonfire and the hope of rescue seemed long forgotten.

Once again, Alice, George, and Tom took first watch by the fire, though the novelty had worn off even for them. They were conscious too, of the day that was to follow, and they were all determined that tonight they’d stay only a few hours before waking Chris and Chloe.

Jess was still sitting by the container, but about an hour into their watch she appeared out of the dark like an apparition, moving past the fire without apparently seeing them. She almost could have been sleepwalking.

Alice said, “Are you going to bed, Jess?”

She nodded and drifted toward the stairs at the side of the plane.