Back What You Can See From Here
Chapters (42)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication Page
  3. Prologue
  4. Part One
  5. MEADOW, MEADOW
  6. THE OPTICIAN’S LOVE
  7. AN AS-YET-UNDISCOVERED LAND MAMMAL
  8. MON CHÉRI
  9. WITH DEEPEST SYMPATHIES
  10. SEX WITH RENATA BLOWS MY MIND
  11. IT’S BEAUTIFUL HERE
  12. EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH
  13. THE TWENTY-NINTH HOUR
  14. Part Two
  15. SOMEONE OUTSIDE
  16. OPEN THE DOOR
  17. IT’S LIKE THIS
  18. I JUST WANTED TO ASK HOW ALASKA IS DOING
  19. EXPIRATION DATES
  20. IVY FROM ELSBETH’S POINT OF VIEW
  21. FELICITÀ
  22. SIXTY-FIVE PERCENT
  23. ONE THOUSAND YEARS AT SEA
  24. THE BLUE WHALE’S HEAVY HEART
  25. BIOLUMINESCENCE
  26. ANIMALS CAN SENSE THESE THINGS
  27. SEE ABOVE
  28. NO NEW INFORMATION
  29. Part Three
  30. ENDLESS EXPANSES
  31. CHASING AWAY THE DEER
  32. ON INTIMATE TERMS WITH THE WORLD
  33. IT WAS YOU
  34. HENRY, THE COACH IS BREAKING
  35. OKAPIA JOHNSTONI
  36. SINCE YOU’RE ALREADY LYING HERE
  37. THE OPPOSITE IS TRUE
  38. FREDERIK
  39. EPILOGUE
  40. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  41. A NOTE ON THE AUTHOR
  42. A NOTE ABOUT THE TRANSLATOR

“Storehouse consciousness,” Frederik said.

“Exactly.” Dr. Maschke beamed.

“What do you mean, you had a lovely day together?” I asked.

“Alaska visited me this summer, we spent the entire day together.”

I thought of the day Alaska had disappeared and Frederik had appeared.

“He was with you?”

Frederik looked at me. “So that was Alaska’s adventure. You look pale. Are you all right?”

I was pale because you always change colors when the opposite is suddenly the case. “Why did he run to you, of all people?”

“Because he missed Peter, I assume,” Dr. Maschke said. “And I’m very close to your father. Animals can sense that kind of thing.”

“I’m very close to my father, too,” I retorted.

“Yes, but you know, psychoanalysis brings a different kind of closeness.”

Frederik laid his hand on my back. “Go away,” I thought fervently in Dr. Maschke’s direction.

“Unfortunately, I have to go now,” Frederik said to him.

“But about ālayavijñna …” Dr. Maschke said. “When does your flight leave? Mine’s not for a half an hour yet.”

I elbowed Frederik discreetly in the ribs. He looked at me. “Before my flight I need to instruct Luisa in the noble truths. If you know what I mean.”

Naturally Dr. Maschke knew what he meant. “It’s an honor for me to meet a pro like you. It’s marvelous that you’ve decided to follow this path.”

“Now pull yourself together,” I said, pretending I was talking to Alaska, who was still fawning over Dr. Maschke and pulling hard on his leash in the direction the doctor was disappearing.

We watched him go. “The opposite is true,” I said softly. “I can’t believe it.”

We ran to security, through which only Frederik could go. Dr. Maschke and storehouse consciousness had stolen a lot of our time. We only had a few minutes left.

“You know what,” Frederik suggested, “when the opposite is true, it may apply in a few other cases as well.”

“For example?”

“Maybe you were made to travel the seven seas.”

“Thanks again for the bookshelf,” I said.

And Frederik replied, “Breathe, Luisa.”

“Where, again?”

“Into your belly.”

“Speaking of which,” I said, pulling a bag out of my purse. I’d packed a lot of peanuts.

“Thanks,” Frederik said.

He rubbed a hand over his head as if he’d forgotten he had no hair.

“I know there are a lot of open questions, Luisa.”

I couldn’t see Frederik’s open questions. Mine lay at my feet like dangerous spots outlined in red. Where do we go from here? was one of them, for example. What do we do now? was another.

“I don’t have any answers right now,” he said. “Unless you’d like to ask me about Yogācāra Buddhism.”

He smiled and took my face in his hands.

“You’re all blurry again, Luisa.”