“Five, Mom.” June 25 — there is something special about that date. This all feels so familiar. And yet different.

I didn’t run into the street! Diesel’s voice inside me. Growling, deep and rumbly, like coffee brewing.

June 25. Of course. The first day of my life without Diesel. The day after that Smart Car killed him.

I learned my lesson, he barks again.

Déjà vu? I squeeze my forehead with my other hand and swallow hard. Everything swirls.

Déjà vécu, Diesel’s voice answers. We have already lived it.

How can we have already lived this? Wait a minute, you speak French? It’s all too much. You’re not even a poodle!

Mom stares at me. “You don’t look good. I wonder how long you were passed out.”

I shake my head. I want to throw up. Did I live the future in a hallucination? That clearly? Am I psychic? Did I see my own death?

Diesel lays his head over my feet. Calm, calm. The now, the now.

“We should run you over to the hospital. Maybe when your father gets here. Where is that man?” Mom peers out to the front of the house.

They’ll put me in the psych ward if I tell them about the dog voice in my head. “Do I have to go there?” I ask. They’ll give me something to make it go away.

“To the hospital? If you have a concussion —”

“No. I mean to Aunt Cathie’s. Can’t she just bring Luanne over here?” Last time through this, I went over there. Can I change things, even a little?

Baby Cheerios? Bring her here! Yes, yes. Diesel’s tail thumps hard.

Luanne always tosses him cereal bits.

Mom squints into my eyes. “I don’t see how that’s any better.”

“I won’t need to walk in the heat, for one.” Plus I don’t ever want to take chances with Diesel again. This way he will stay safe; he won’t have to chase after me. “All my stuff is here. We have the big screen. I can just lie on the couch.” And sort things through.

Diesel lifts himself and leans his head on my lap.

“Yes, but Luanne’s crib is over there.” Mom digs her fists into her hips.

The lump at the back of my head turns numb. I put down the bag of frozen corn and rub Diesel’s silky ears. Yes, yes, that voice soothes in my head.

“I’m feeling a lot better already.”

Mom’s mouth bunches. Of course she doesn’t want to leave me alone with Luanne. If anyone in our family had any kind of money, she wouldn’t worry about missing a few hours of work. She’d stay home with me.

The phone rings, and when she picks up, I can tell it’s my aunt. Mom explains the situation to her and my solution. “My shift starts later. I have to leave by eleven. If she doesn’t look better, I’ll ask James to stay with her.”

At the mention of Dad’s name, I wonder about him and Mom. Is it possible that they’re still together? That the whole breakup was a part of that super-vivid hallucination?