At just gone midnight, Bess stood in front of the bathroom mirror and stared at her reflection, her movements slow and heavy, her thoughts stuttering. With a shaking hand she removed the residue of make-up she had not already cried off and cleaned her teeth. It was a strange thing to have woken up feeling like one person and then be going to bed seeing herself as someone else entirely. Gripping the side of the washbasin, she felt the strength leave her knees and swayed a little, before heaving herself up to stare at the face that stared back at her.

‘It’s time, Bess. The right time to sit down and talk – really talk – about all the difficult stuff. You need to tell him everything. Everything.’ Knowing she had absolutely nothing to lose now, she reached out and touched the outline of her face reflected in the mirror. ‘A whole secret world inside my head.’ His words were as painful as they were accurate. Driven by a power she did not know she possessed, she stood tall before pulling her hair into a ponytail and grabbing a bundle of loo roll, which she shoved in her dressing-gown pocket, knowing without a doubt she would be needing it later. She had planned to sleep in Natalie’s old room, putting as much separation between her and Mario as was possible, but right now she knew that separation was the last thing they needed. She had to talk to her husband.

Mario was in his pyjama bottoms and a clean T-shirt, leaning back against the headboard. He was quiet, reflective. At the sight of her, he leant over and clicked off the bedside lamp. Bess walked over and switched it back on.

‘I’ve had a very long day,’ he growled, ‘and I have an early start tomorrow.’

‘I know. We both have.’ She was grateful for her steady voice; it helped her believe she could get through this. Closing her eyes tight shut, she sat down on the floor at his side of the bed, her head level with the mattress, as she leant on the bedroom wall. This position was vital to enable her to get the words out; she couldn’t have looked her husband in the eye if she had wanted to. Doing her best to ignore the rumble in her gut, hollow with fear, Bess crossed her legs.

‘You’re right,’ she said.

‘So you did have sex with him?’ he fired.

‘No, not about that.’ She was glad of the lamplight; it muted the emotion that threatened. ‘It’s what you said earlier – I do have a secret world that I escape to when I wash the dishes or do the hoovering, and it is exactly like being in a trance.’

‘Well, I hope that wherever it is you escape to is worth it because it’s damaged us.’ His voice was hoarse, shot through with anger.