He had never seen such confusion, and his legs felt weak. He stared down, aware that a lot of people round him really were running, for they had spotted their families. The crowd surged as reunions took place, and he watched men disappear into scrums of women and children who hugged and kissed them, and wouldn’t let them go – he could see an old woman in floods of tears, her hands raised in triumph. He stood alone, wondering how he would ever find Maria, if she had actually managed to come for him. She’d said she would, but he knew the journey to the airport took four hours and she was bound to be delayed. In any case, they would never find each other. He should have insisted on taking a hotel, for he had never felt so overwhelmed. Every face was Filipino, and he was watching such personal, private rituals of joy.

Why his eye alighted on a particular group, he didn’t know.

Perhaps it was because everyone in that particular cluster was staring at him, and even at that distance he felt their gaze? Perhaps it was the fact that one of the children was on a man’s shoulders, waving her arms slowly in full circles? What he knew was that it had to be an optical illusion, for the woman standing in the middle looked so like his friend – and she was flapping her hands at him, calling something he couldn’t possibly hear.

He knew it wasn’t her, because it couldn’t be – he deserved nothing.

He felt his knees simply give way, and he clutched the wall for support. He was back on the ledge, in another storm, and the tears blurred his vision. He had to wipe them away fast in case the illusion disappeared – he had to clean his glasses. It was Maria, Jao and all of the children, and they were screaming his name. He did manage to wave, and they were frantic in their response – for a moment, he heard a howl of ‘Michael!’

They could not come for him, for families weren’t allowed up on the ramp. They had to wait whilst he got himself together and walked on. They had to wait as he stumbled all the way down, on rubber legs. When he got to the bottom, he still couldn’t get to them – he had to go through a final cordon of airport officials, and he had to take more steps. He was like a deep-sea diver with a suitcase.