“But you stayed, Rorn.” I wrung my hands. “You didn’t ignore her. You evidently ended up staying with her.” It shouldn’t have mattered. Not anymore. But I couldn’t help but wonder if he had told me the truth, then would I have tried harder to forgive him? Could I have held on to that love for just a little while longer before it faded to the intrusion of a growing longing for another?

Many a creature had lost love when a fated mate came along. Many also decided to fight it, to ignore the painful pull toward another and commit to living their lives without it—without them. Regardless of what anyone chose, there were often casualties for all.

“I didn’t,” Rorn said. “Not at first. We left, but the town was so ravaged, the people so distraught, that we needed to escort them to new shelter before we returned to the towers.”

I nodded, though he didn’t see, not needing to know the rest. “You still haven’t accepted the bond.” Which was probably why I hadn’t been able to scent too much of a difference with him—to know he was spoken for in that way, as he was already spoken for in marriage.

His silence was answer enough.

“Please know that I loved you,” I said, barely a whisper. “Perhaps more than was ever good for me.”

“You’ll find having a mate to be just as consuming, Astrantia,” he argued, and his voice lowered with the muttered admission I assumed he’d rather withhold. “If not more.”

I refrained from saying it would indeed be different.

He didn’t need to know that I wouldn’t shape my entire existence around one person again. That I planned to live my life for me, and to be grateful that my mate was there to share it with.

“I know you loved me,” Rorn said when the silence grew too loud. “I know because I watched it bleed from you for months until nothing was left, and I couldn’t stop it. I couldn’t…” He squeezed the crown. “I couldn’t make that love stay.”

My cheeks grew wet with an immediate flood of tears.

I had to go.

I had to leave, yet I didn’t know how to say goodbye. I didn’t know how to say goodbye to someone I’d never thought would exit my life.

As each second cooled, the sun sinking lower, I thought perhaps it was best I didn’t, and that I simply whisper instead, “Make sure you fight, Rorn. For all that you want. For Carelda and for Helvectus. For your people and for your life.”

Finally, I turned to leave.

He seized me and turned me into his chest.