‘Only about that, I swear. And maybe I let you think Erin and I had had an affair, but it wasn’t a million miles from the truth. We split up when she got sick because I was under a lot of pressure at the time and I couldn’t handle it. I’d been offered a new job and, if I’m being honest, I used it as an excuse. I didn’t want to watch her suffer, and she had family who were better equipped to look after her than me. But later, after she married Josh and she knew she was dying, she was desperate to see me. After everything I’d done, she still loved me, Faith. And if there had been some miracle cure for her, we would have got back together. We were meant to be.’

Faith’s jaw clenched as she watched Nick put down the spoon. He thought he could talk his way out of this.

Aware that the pair of frightened schoolgirls by the door were scrutinising her every move, Faith took a sip of tonic water. Her hand shook and the glass knocked against her teeth. It was something she had seen many of her fellow members do after oversharing an aspect of their lives. She had learnt a lot from them, so much more than she had gleaned from textbooks on the subject of grief.

‘Why did Nick threaten you with a knife?’ Tara asked.

‘Seriously?’ asked Faith. ‘You want to do this now? Here of all places?’

‘Yes, here,’ Tara said. ‘Why did it descend into violence so quickly?’

‘I’ve explained it all to the police, but fine, make me go through it again,’ Faith said weakly. ‘When Nick knew he wasn’t going to be able to talk his way out of it, he decided to take what he wanted by force.’

‘And he picked up the knife first?’ asked Tara.

Faith refused to follow Tara’s gaze to the stainless steel knife block. There were five slots, but only four knives. The missing one had been on the chopping board amongst a scattering of peelings that Nick had made a half-hearted attempt to clear away. There had been more slivers of carrot and onion skins on the floor, tracing his path from chopping board to bin. At least Derek had been house proud, she had thought.

‘I’m not interested in hearing your fairy tales,’ Faith told Nick. ‘You expect me to believe any woman would be interested in a heartless coward like you?’

‘I’m not saying I deserved her forgiveness but—’

‘And you don’t deserve mine.’

‘I know I don’t, but that won’t stop me trying,’ he said, taking a step forward. ‘I’ll say whatever you want me to say to make you trust me again, Faith.’