Nick held her gaze. ‘I wish I had stepped up,’ he said. ‘You look at me and you see a bastard, but believe me, I do too. My only defence is that I was rooting for Erin to get better and make a go of it with Josh. Erin wanted that too, but when she realised she was dying, she got in touch. Time was running out and we couldn’t ignore our feelings for each other any longer.’ Nick hung his head down and played with the cuff of his shirt until he had composed himself. He coughed. ‘I don’t want to use Erin’s cancer as an excuse, but neither do I want you to think badly of her. She died keeping her love for me a secret because she didn’t want to hurt her husband, and I had to do the same. I wasn’t allowed to grieve. That’s why I was such a mess. That’s why I’m here.’

The room fell silent, and even April couldn’t think of a smart retort. She refused to feel sorry for Nick, however. He was still a liar and so was his dead girlfriend.

‘We thought it best that Nick was open with the group,’ Tara said. ‘And as I mentioned before, this is not about judging the rights or wrongs of what Nick and Erin did, this is about whether we as a group can continue to offer support. We all have our own stories and not everyone’s experiences are the same, but we have a certain commonality. The question is, are there enough commonalities between Nick and the rest of us to allow him to remain in the group.’ She gave nothing away about her own feelings on the matter.

‘It makes no odds to me,’ Steve said, sitting back in his seat with his arms folded. ‘We both lost the women we loved to cancer. I feel bad for the husband, but it’s Nick who came to us. His loss might be slightly different, but that doesn’t mean it’s any less. It wasn’t an easy job to nurse Bella at the end, but at least I was there. I’m guessing you weren’t.’

The tears welling in Nick’s eyes threatened to spill as he shook his head.

‘I can’t say I’m as comfortable with this as Steve,’ said Nadiya. ‘There are things the rest of us will have experienced as long-term partners that Nick won’t … That said, I’m willing to give it a try.’

A few of the others echoed Nadiya’s reservations, but no one was willing to step forward and say that Nick hadn’t earned his place. April was on her own and she had to speak up.