‘Of course I get it!’ I shout, tears streaming now. ‘I’m the only one who really needs her. She’s like the only good thing in my whole life. All this shit, everything I do is for her. I need her more than anything else.’ I bury my face in my hands, stabbing my fingers into my eyes as I rub them. It’s only when I blink that I notice the car parked diagonally across an empty ambulance bay next to us.

‘Wait,’ I say, sniffing as I stare at it. ‘Is that…’

‘Yeah,’ she says, grinding her cigarette under her boot. ‘I’ve got the papers and all.’

My head swivels between the car and her in disbelief. It looks like any car on any road in town, except she’s got the keys.

‘Rach,’ I say, heart starting to race again. ‘The police are actually waiting for you inside. You don’t even have a licence. Do you honestly think you’ll get away with it?’

‘Doesn’t matter,’ she says, pulling out another cigarette. ‘It’s legit. Totally. Except maybe where I’ve parked it…’ She trails off as her lighter flares.

I squint at the car. There’s even the outline of one of those baby seats in the back.

‘I don’t understand,’ I say. I don’t understand anything that’s happened today, I think.

‘Well you don’t have to, do you?’ She reaches out to pull me into her arms. I slump against her, head spinning, feeling her ribs hard against my face, smell of smoke thick in every fibre of her clothes. ‘Let’s go get her, OK? They can’t stop us, they know they can’t. We’ll wrap her up nice and warm in the back, get her some medicine from that all-night place on the way into town. And I know somewhere we can go get her looked at if she’s a mess again. We won’t have to come back here. I promise, Carls, OK?’

I feel her chin resting on the top of my head as her arms tighten around me.147

‘They’re all just trying to scare us. They can’t stop us taking her home if we want, and they know it. All that medical records crap … total bollocks.’

‘How do you know?’ I say, muffled in her chest. ‘They know everything at the clinic, don’t they? Every time we go I get grief about the last time.’

She grips both my shoulders as she pushes me away, looking me in the face.

‘That’s because it’s the same place isn’t it? Same people, same place, same old story.’

‘But what if she has another fit?’ I blink at her. She looks mad, crazy even, the moon lighting her like a ghost, all white and black in the dark.