Mum didn’t know the reasons I could never go back to my old job – I would have to find another one, somehow explain the time I’d been out of work, cross my fingers for a decent reference from my old boss, Daphne, who I was sure knew exactly what had happened with Damian. Juggle work with a small baby. ‘I suppose.’ Even though Nick would give me his sad, baffled face if I suggested it. But I brought us here for you. ‘I just feel really lonely. The cottage is so far from anywhere. You were right about that. And I can’t get out during the day. I need a car but Nick says it’s bad for the environment.’ Plus, my neighbour moved there to ruin my life. Nora had been watching at the window when I left, her usual spot. I wondered why I hadn’t found it creepy before.

She was nodding. ‘Yes, that is the dilemma we all have in the countryside. Darling, are you sure this isn’t just baby blues?’

‘I haven’t had the baby yet. That would be after.’

She thought about it. I could see her eyes flicker, not really wanting to get involved – she preferred people to pay her to unpick family messes – but seeing I was upset, that she couldn’t just leave it. ‘I’m sure Nick is just taking care of you. It’s taken so long to get here, hasn’t it? Is there anything that really worries you? Anything he’s done?’

She meant had he hit me, and of course he hadn’t. He just questioned my every move. He just said I was crazy when I was sure the house had got hotter, or music had begun to play, or I couldn’t open the door to get out. He just didn’t like me leaving the house. And why should he? He knew I had lied to him, most likely, about Damian. And I was still lying. I was spending his money chasing down another man, the one I’d cheated on him with, and now that I’d found out the truth, and learned who Nora was, I was still dashing about the country figuring out what to do. From Nick’s point of view, maybe he was very much in the right. And suddenly I was so afraid that if I told my mother the truth of what I’d done, she would side with him. And I couldn’t bear it. I had come here looking for an ally ahead of the coming storm, if I decided to leave Nick, if I confronted Nora and got outed as the cheater I was. I could see now my mother wasn’t going to help, any more than Claudia would. I said, ‘No, nothing like that. I guess I’m just finding the move hard.’