He turned back into the room. For the first time since he’d arrived he looked into Sister Helen’s eyes. He cherished the sweet energy flowing from her, and thought how lucky God was to have her as His wife.

“God tests our faith,” she said. “The road is not easy, nor simple, but it is a road back to Him. While you may doubt, and fear the journey ahead, you must know you’re not alone on the path.”

As uncomfortable as it had been at times, he’d learned to talk with women, being the one boy in a family of them. He understood his mother and came to understand her tears. They would talk for hours about life. She wasn’t happy married to his father, but ritual died hard, and divorce was worse than living with sorrow in the eyes of the church, so she’d cried instead. And while his own marriage was rocky, their arguments and conversations had kept both of them vital and linked. They’d challenged each other and may not have been perfect together, but his heart ached in his wife’s absence.

Through the years he’d been privileged to listen to the female mind. He’d learned to listen when women spoke with passion and intent, although it was one of the first things for which he’d cursed God. That sensitivity didn’t go down with the macho boys of his youth.

He cherished being here, in this space of openness and respect.

“Would you like to see your daughter now?”

As she passed him on their way out, he wanted to touch her in gratitude for her gentleness, but he didn’t. Instead, he said, “Thank you.”

41

41

Jhana-Merise waited for her father by the olive tree in the convent courtyard. Its trunk gnarled upward and its strong arms reached toward the sky. The sweet pungent flavor of the ripening olive fruit filled the air, and their deep purple color vibrated against the red of the setting sun.

There had always been something in her eyes that reflected a deeper wisdom. She was growing up fast, but he wanted to hold onto the little girl.

He held tight to the flood of love in his heart. He didn’t want to overwhelm her.

There were many things he had wanted to tell her, but he didn’t want to burden her with his life.

He saw her watching him with gentle grace in the courtyard. The pressure on his heart released and gave him an unfamiliar peace.

She nestled her head into his chest. He folded his arms around her.

“I heard you speak to me before you were born,” he said.

She looked up at him, her eyes bright.

“I heard you answer, Daddy.”

Perhaps she was a savior, he thought. She’d saved him.