But sitting with his poor betrayed parents now, he understood. Like Ting-Yan, Tak-Tam knew what it felt like not to be loved back by the one you loved. His heart, too, was broken. They had that in common, that bottomless feeling in the stomach like one’s world was about to end, but not before one shamed oneself one last time through the bowels. For indeed the loss of the thing never possessed did constitute a kind of shame. Ting-Yan had felt it and cursed Tak-Wing and Emily in order to expiate it. But in some ways Tak-Tam was in a worse position. Ting-Yan hadn’t gained anything from her rejection of him. Unlike Tak-Wing who gained Emily by rejecting Ting-Yan, Ting-Yan gained no one by rejecting Tak-Tam. She had no golden moment to hold. And because she had none, Tak-Tam couldn’t curse her. He had to hold this shivering nausea as something ongoing and continuous, something that would never leave him, something he could never shed. Her curse had entered his ear and made him want to shit.

And yet, because he loved Ting-Yan, he identified with her. He felt for her. When she had fled the club, he had wanted to leave the flowery proscenium and go after her. But loyalty to family must stand above all things. He had glanced at his brother, shining like a golden god beside his beloved on the altar. Tak-Tam loved his brother more than anything on earth. He felt his brother to be a part of him. He couldn’t have betrayed Tak-Wing in that moment when Tak-Wing’s life was being consolidated by marriage to his soulmate—and by the recognition of the toffs at the HKCC, essentially the princes of the city who held the power of life and death over Hong Kong. Of course, he loved Ting-Yan more than anything on this earth too. So much of what Tak-Tam was existed beyond this world. But his love for Ting-Yan came after his love for his brother, at least in that moment. They were loves of different kinds, and that moment said he had to stay beside Tak-Wing.

But different moments allow for different actions. Now that the wedding was over and Tak-Wing and Emily were safely and publicly married, the duty of that moment was done.

“Will you arrange for me to visit Ting-Yan at Chek Keng? Can I talk to Captain Lee myself?” he asked his mother and father.

“He was here earlier today,” Cheung said. “I think he’s still docked down at the typhoon shelter. Why don’t we go down there and see?”

They locked up the house, then hurried down the road alongside the nullah, past all the sellers of turnip cake, sweet potatoes, tea eggs, and soup noodles. They stopped to buy oranges and wife cakes as gifts for Lee.