Ryan’s smile faded. “But I lied, Amy.”

“Only because you felt there was no other way.”

“Because I wanted him to concentrate on his recovery and not be thinking about me and the ranch and this stupid thing I’d gone and done.”

“How can you call it stupid when you were the one who made all the difference? You knew what your father needed, and you went with your gut. If anything, I call that brave, Ryan, not stupid.”

“At what cost, though? We might lose the ranch because of me.”

“Except it isn’t because of you.”

“Yes, it is. It’s me who’s been lying about this, keeping it a secret for years, doing everything in my power to keep my father from our accounts, from opening the mail, from anything that might circle back to the truth. That’s all my doing. How can anyone call that brave when my lies have led us to the brink of foreclosure?”

“Okay, can you explain that to me, because there’s something I still don’t get. Wasn’t the plan to get the loan repaid?”

“Yes, that was the plan,” Ryan said, before giving Amy the abridged version of how, due to the slowdown in business and the increased expenses, his once-modest loan had grown to be so stupendous in size. “It got away from me. Week after week, month after month, year after year, it just got worse and worse. Soon I was borrowing just so that we could live.”

“And the whole time, while all this was going on, you never once came close to telling your father?”

He shook his head.

“Not even later, when he started getting better?”

“I was just too scared.”

“But it’s not like you meant for any of this to happen. You did what you did because you love him. Anyone can see that.”

He dropped his head. “I’m not sure any of that matters anymore.”

“It matters. Of course it matters. It’s everything.”

“Remember, we’re not talking about some innocent little lie. We’re talking about losing the ranch. And if he hears about what I’ve done, if he reacts the way I think he’s going to react, then I don’t think I could live with myself.”

“You think he’d never forgive you?”

“Not that. Worse.”

“Worse, how?”

“Worse as in I’m scared he’ll have another stroke. I’m scared that when he finds out the truth, he won’t be able to handle it. I’m scared the shock is gonna be too much and his brain will seize up and explode.”

Ryan wrapped a blade of grass around his finger. He looped it around as many times as possible, as tightly as he could, until the tip of his finger burned a dark scarlet red. “You probably think that’s irrational.”