01010110

The memories kept playing.

In the mayhem, I could not disable them. Thousands of memories playing on thousands of loops. They flickered through my mental wiring, even as the world spun wildly.

As I fell, Emma fell, too.

She clattered through my steel head like a pebble inside a jar. Bouncing against my brain as I tumbled.

Down/Down/Down

. . . a pair of frightened eyes looking up at me from behind a storage station . . .

Down/Down/Down

. . . a leaf twirling between Emma’s fingers . . .

Down/Down/Down

. . . exploring the mall like two children from a vanished time long ago . . .

Down/Down/Down

. . . listening to the rhythm of Emma’s human breath as morning filled the sky . . .

Down/Down/Down

01010111

SPLASH!

My legs plunged into the river up to my knees. The rest of me would have followed, but I grabbed a tree root at the last possible moment. My downward momentum suddenly halted.

The current rushed around the metal contours of my legs. I could feel the force of the water.

Tugging at me.

Trying to rip me away.

Trying to take me with it.

My fingers tightened over the root. I held on with a single hand.

Twisting my body sideways, I attempted to swing my other arm around. If I could just get a second hand on the root, I might be able to lift myself, to climb out of the water.

I lunged for the root with my free hand. I missed. I did not even come close.

My brain clouded with calculations. Length of arm/Distance to root/Angle of reach. I gathered my findings. The result blinked through my circuitry.

Impossible

I did not need to be a highly advanced piece of technology to understand my problem: No matter what I did, I was going to end up in the same place.

The river.

The howl of rushing water filled my audio ports. The river was constant/endless/deadly. It would not let go. But sooner or later, I would. My grip on the root was loosening. The force of the water was too powerful.

A definition pulsed through my thoughts.

Inevitable. Adjective. 1. Certain to happen.

2. Unavoidable.

It was only a matter of time until the river swallowed me.

My fingers slipped.

I knew what was coming.

It was inevitable.

I tried to distract myself by counting to a million. In binary. An avalanche of ones and zeroes. But I kept getting distracted.

By the river pulling at me.

And by thoughts of my FamilyUnit. The secrets I had kept from them. The words I would never get to say.

I am sorry.

I had my reasons.

Goodbye.

I thought about my coworkers. About the time we spent together in the solar farm (81,216 hours). About the number of solar panels we installed (1,300,158). About the number of times I told them they were my friends (0).