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Chapters (60)
  1. Copyright Notice
  2. Dedication
  3. TED BANNERMAN
  4. OLIVIA
  5. TED
  6. DEE
  7. TED
  8. OLIVIA
  9. DEE
  10. TED
  11. OLIVIA
  12. DEE
  13. TED
  14. OLIVIA
  15. TED
  16. OLIVIA
  17. TED
  18. DEE
  19. OLIVIA
  20. TED
  21. OLIVIA
  22. TED
  23. DEE
  24. OLIVIA
  25. TED
  26. OLIVIA
  27. TED
  28. OLIVIA
  29. TED
  30. DEE
  31. TED
  32. LAUREN
  33. OLIVIA
  34. TED
  35. OLIVIA
  36. DEE
  37. TED
  38. OLIVIA
  39. TED
  40. OLIVIA
  41. DEE
  42. OLIVIA
  43. TED
  44. OLIVIA
  45. DEE
  46. TED
  47. LAUREN
  48. TED
  49. LAUREN
  50. TED
  51. NIGHT OLIVIA
  52. TED
  53. LITTLE TEDDY
  54. TED
  55. AFTERWORD
  56. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  57. BIBLIOGRAPHY
  58. Also by Catriona Ward
  59. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  60. Newsletter Sign-up

Mommy’s hand fell on my shoulder. “Put it back, Teddy.”

“But it’s not real,” I said. “It’s just wooden. I could keep it in the house.”

“It is time for lunch,” she said. “Come.”

She tied a napkin around my neck and handed me two small jars with blue-and-white labels—one of puréed apples, one of carrots—and a spoon. I imagined that eyes were on us, although they probably weren’t. Around us other kids were eating hot dogs and sandwiches. Mommy saw me look.

“Those things are full of fat and preservatives,” she said. “Our lunch is nutritionally complete. All the vitamins you need are in these jars. And it is inexpensive.” She spoke in her nursing voice, which was a little deeper than her regular voice, the consonants more clipped. Mommy looked after sick kids in her job at the hospital. She knew what she was talking about. So you didn’t argue with the nurse voice. Daddy was between jobs. Like it was a dark gap he fell into, and now he couldn’t climb out. He ate his prunes and rice pudding without a word. The jars looked tiny in his large brown hands. He took out his coffee Thermos.

Nearby, a baby was being fed by an impatient red woman. The label was blue and white. With a cold stab of horror I saw that the baby was eating the same creamed rice as my father. “Put it away,” I said to Daddy. “People will see!”

Mommy looked at me, but said nothing. “Finish your lunch,” she told him gently.

When we were done Mommy put the jars away neatly in the cooler. “You know where I am from, Teddy,” she said.

“Locronan,” I said, “which is in Brittany. Which is in France.” That was all I knew. Mommy never spoke of that place.