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Chapters (69)
  1. Cover
  2. Title Page
  3. Dedication
  4. Epigraph
  5. The First Crossing
  6. Chapter One
  7. Chapter Two
  8. Chapter Three
  9. Chapter Four
  10. Chapter Five
  11. Chapter Six
  12. Chapter Seven
  13. Chapter Eight
  14. Chapter Nine
  15. Chapter Ten
  16. Chapter Eleven
  17. Chapter Twelve
  18. Chapter Thirteen
  19. Chapter Fourteen
  20. Chapter Fifteen
  21. Chapter Sixteen
  22. Chapter Seventeen
  23. Chapter Eighteen
  24. Chapter Nineteen
  25. Chapter Twenty
  26. Chapter Twenty-One
  27. Chapter Twenty-Two
  28. Chapter Twenty-Three
  29. Cross Country
  30. Chapter Twenty-Four
  31. Chapter Twenty-Five
  32. Chapter Twenty-Six
  33. Chapter Twenty-Seven
  34. Chapter Twenty-Eight
  35. Chapter Twenty-Nine
  36. Chapter Thirty
  37. Chapter Thirty-One
  38. Chapter Thirty-Two
  39. Chapter Thirty-Three
  40. Chapter Thirty-Four
  41. Chapter Thirty-Five
  42. Chapter Thirty-Six
  43. Chapter Thirty-Seven
  44. Chapter Thirty-Eight
  45. The Woods
  46. Chapter Thirty-Nine
  47. Chapter Forty
  48. Chapter Forty-One
  49. Chapter Forty-Two
  50. Chapter Forty-Three
  51. Chapter Forty-Four
  52. Chapter Forty-Five
  53. Chapter Forty-Six
  54. Chapter Forty-Seven
  55. Chapter Forty-Eight
  56. Chapter Forty-Nine
  57. Chapter Fifty
  58. Chapter Fifty-One
  59. Chapter Fifty-Two
  60. Chapter Fifty-Three
  61. Chapter Fifty-Four
  62. Chapter Fifty-Five
  63. Chapter Fifty-Six
  64. The Last Crossing
  65. Chapter Fifty-Seven
  66. Chapter Fifty-Eight
  67. Chapter Fifty-Nine
  68. Acknowledgements
  69. Copyright

‘Is Karen still about?’ he asked, a little wary at the warmth of Kelly’s greeting. Kelly’s sense of their rapprochement seemingly more genuine than Tony’s own.

‘She’s up the stairs. She wasn’t feeling great–’

‘Thanks,’ Tony said, turning to leave.

‘Wait! I’d leave her, mate.’

Tony looked askance at him. ‘I’ll go on up, thanks,’ he said. ‘She’s expecting me.’

‘Just looking out for you,’ Kelly said, his hands raised in surrender.

Tony squeezed his way up the stairs, past several assembled couples that had taken position there, though they barely noticed his passing.

There were four doors at the top of the stairs, three closed, one slightly ajar to reveal what Tony assumed to be a small toilet, judging by the noise of someone urinating in there. He knocked and opened the first door where a couple, partially clothed for the moment, lay in an embrace on the bed. The couple in the second room had progressed further, her bent over the bed, him standing, trousers at his ankles, behind her. He turned and grinned at Tony without stopping.

‘Fuck off!” she shouted as she saw the cause of her partner’s distraction.

Tony muttered his apologies as he closed the door, moving to the third, knocking and pushing it open.

The third bedroom was empty. For a second, Tony assumed that Kelly had been mistaken, or that perhaps Karen had given up waiting and left. Just then, the door of the first bedroom opened and the drunken couple emerged. He had his trousers still half unbuttoned while he tried to tuck in his shirt, she, head lowered, was rebuttoned her own shirt the wrong way, so that it gaped in the middle, showing her bra beneath.

‘Karen?’ Tony asked.

She looked up at him, her face a blear of make-up, her eyes unfocused as she squinted slightly at him.

‘Tony?’ she said.

Chapter Thirty-Four

Chapter Thirty-Four

‘Tony?’ she repeated.

He raised his head. They were back in the car now and on their way again. He was almost surprised to see she was older, her features hardened a little with age. Yet he still felt the pain of her betrayal as something visceral, as if it had happened a moment earlier.

‘Are you OK?’

Absurdly, he wondered if she’d just shared in his reverie of that night, if she felt any guilt, remorse at what had happened.

‘I’m fine,’ he said, more petulantly than he’d intended, earning a brief frown from Karen before she motioned towards where Barr sat.

‘I was asking you, are you OK to stay over and go back tomorrow?’