Denizens of the Nevernever

If you are wise, you will do as little as possible to draw the attention of the fey. Sometimes, even if you are a quiet observer, the fey will find you. If this occurs, there are a few steps you can follow that may allow you to escape with your free will and, if you are lucky, your life.

• Always be polite. Discourtesy is a deep insult to the fey and will not be well received, no matter how cool you think it will make you look.

• Do not be deceived by the politeness of the fey. Fey are almost always polite. This does not mean they will not happily remove your head. They will, however, be grateful for the entertainment you provided. Or, if you are very unlucky, the sustenance.

• There is no such thing as a free lunch. In the Nevernever, there is no free. Accept no gifts, no matter how sure you are that there are no strings attached. There are always enough strings attached to tie you up in a pretty bow and deliver you to someone who will be grateful for the sustenance.

• Give gifts freely. The fey will either think you are a masterful manipulator and respect you more, or be completely befuddled by the notion of a gift with no obligations.

• Never, ever, under any circumstances, enter into a contract with the fey. It always ends badly and often fatally. In the rare cases where it does not end badly, that is because it does not end. You will be bound for eternity.

• If you have to run, zig and zag. Many faeries carry bows and arrows.

• If you chance upon a big, gray cat, you probably owe him a favor. Even if you do not remember the favor, do it, anyway. In the long run, you will do it, but it will be far less painful if you do it up front.

How Do I Leave Faery?

The best answer to this question is, quickly. Spending a lot of time within the realms of the Nevernever can lead to many strange effects. A few minutes in Faery may be years in the mortal realm, or the reverse may be true. If you leave by a different trod than you entered, even one only a few feet away, you may find yourself on the other side of the world, or at the bottom of the ocean. Here are a few things to remember when attempting to leave the Nevernever.

• Always keep track of how to return to the trod by which you entered.

• Never, ever ask for directions or a way out. Most fey will help you, but they will charge a steep price, most commonly your tongue, as they do not want you to share this information. Note: if they ever catch on to texting, they may start asking for thumbs, as well.