‘Hold the gun firm but gentle. Like an honourable man’s handshake.’

I can tell you now that it isn’t easy to do that when you’re shivering with cold and fear but I kept my eyes on her and steadied myself.

‘Get into firing position.’

I tucked the gun into my shoulder and kept my eyes on the prize. Then I pressed my cheek against the stock. I could hear Sarge’s words in my head.

‘Take off the catch and keep your eyes open.’

I knew what would come next. The loud bang. And when you know that’s coming all you want to do is close your eyes, block it out. I could feel mine going but I forced myself to keep them open.

‘Keep the target in sight.’

I stared down at her. She could sense something. Her eyes moved fast from left to right. Then her body went all frozen, like one of the ice statues in my Narnia book. I heard Sarge whisper behind me.

‘On a count of three.’

Taking a deep breath, I started to count.

‘One.’

I curved my finger back towards the trigger.

‘Two.’

My heart was beating so fast it felt like it was going to burst out of my chest.

‘Three.’

The noise was so loud it almost knocked me off my feet. I staggered backwards and swung the gun round.

Sarge ran towards me and grabbed the gun.

‘Jesus, be careful, child,’ he shouted. ‘That’s a weapon in your hand, not a toy.’

For a moment I forgot where I was. The noise of the gunshot was ringing in my ears and I went all dizzy. Then I saw Sarge heading towards her so I pulled myself together and followed him into the clearing.

‘Did I … did I get her?’ I said.

Sarge was crouched down near where she fell, but his long woollen army coat was blocking my view of her.

‘Sarge? Did I get her?’

He turned round and my heart sank. I recognized the look in his eyes. Disappointment.

He shook his head.

‘You shot her in the legs,’ he said. ‘You’ve paralysed her but she’s still alive.’

‘But she can’t be alive,’ I shouted.

It didn’t make sense. I’d followed Sarge’s instructions to the letter.

‘It’s okay,’ he said. He said this in a nicer voice because he could see I was upset. ‘This was your first time. It takes practice.’

‘What shall we do with her?’ I asked.

‘She’ll need to be put out of her misery,’ he said. ‘She won’t survive out here with this injury.’

‘Okay,’ I said. ‘Do what you need to do.’

Sarge looked at me then and shook his head. His face was hard again.

‘No,’ he said. ‘This is your kill. You have to finish it.’

Of course I was scared but I thought of the moon all alone up there in the vast night sky and I thought of Sarge trampling through the desert on next to no sleep and then I thought for a second or two about the dead mum in the desert and the vixen with the amber eyes but I put those two out of my head. Then I bent down and wrung her neck, just like I’d seen Sarge do with the chickens we keep in the garden.