‘It’s a hazel tree,’ he’d said, holding it out to her on the doorstep as though he doubted being invited in. ‘I thought that, maybe … Well, maybe once it’s a bit bigger we could plant it in the garden, for Will.’

She’d pulled him into her arms, mumbled yes through her tears. He’d come back, and that was what she’d needed. They’d been inseparable since.

She knew Kaz would be a wonderful father, however they decided to try next time. She had no doubt of the equality between them. But that was what the pouch had achieved, wasn’t it? Without that, she wouldn’t be considering what she was considering. Could she do it, though – did she really have the strength to do it? She’d have to go through labour. She didn’t know how much pain she could take.

She’d been reading a lot, these past few weeks. They both had. Watching videos together, too. Absorbing different points of view. She’d heard her mum and nana talk so often about the pouch, but she hadn’t heard anyone really talking about the alternative. And now she wanted to. There was a woman in the States, a midwife for natural birth, who said that the key to a happy delivery was laughter. That we shouldn’t fear it, we should laugh through it. Her smile was so warm it was hard not to wish to share her views – Ina May, with her long grey hair and her kind voice. Rosie had memorised what she said, she thought it was so good. ‘It’s very easy to scare women about childbirth,’ she said. ‘But it’s not very nice. It’s bad manners. So let’s not do it.’ Was that what FullLife had been doing, quietly, subconsciously, for three generations?

Rosie didn’t want to be afraid. She didn’t want any woman to feel afraid.

She looked up at Kaz. His face was soft, hopeful – like when they had first talked about having baby Will. She placed her hands on her belly and imagined the shape there, and suddenly Kaz was kneeling down by the side of the bed and doing the same. With their hands, they made the shape of Rosie’s pregnant belly. Kaz blew it an air kiss. He looked quite ridiculous, she thought, and then she smiled. But it didn’t feel right – not yet. She needed more time. She pulled Kaz up to sit next to her on the bed and she hadn’t really meant to do it, but she found that her hands now made the shape of the pouch around his belly. He was doing the same. He was holding his belly, where he had carried Will, his arms wrapped around himself, and he was rocking, silently, on the bed.