She’s here, I know, or if she’s not, I’m going to pretend hard that she is. Here in my head, not easily forgotten. Wherever she is, I hope she has the curly hair of her dreams, the hair she always wanted instead of the straight hair she got. I hope she lives out every career she ever considered, I hope she gets to play clarinet all day long, hell, I hope there are only hot available clarinet players in her village.

Nothing will ever be the same, but I allow the sun to sink into my body, let myself be optimistic for a change.

I weave my way from the tap near the tennis courts, through the scattered girls, my filled-up water bottle in my hand. How easy it would be to pop the top off it and sweep my arm like a powerful wizard drawing an arc of magic, shooting surprise splashes of cold water over these relaxed bodies, these brave girls.

Making us scream, making us feel more alive.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Acknowledgments

The Gaps took seven long years to write and was a difficult book to get across the line. I started writing it, unexpectedly, during a residency at Peking University, which was supported by Asialink Arts and the Malcolm Robertson Foundation. Asialink provides significant cultural exchanges between Australia and Asia, and my residency in Beijing was a life-changing opportunity. Thank you so much to Liu Hongzhong and David and Karen Walker for their friendship and support on this trip, and to the Australian Studies Centre at Peking University for hosting me. Much gratitude also to Zhang Bochen and Zhan Chunjuan for interesting conversations and lending me their names.

I wrote The Gaps with the support of the Victorian Government, through Creative Victoria.

Many thanks to my early readers, writing cheer squad and unofficial career advisers: Andrew McDonald, Myke Bartlett, Chris Miles, Alison Arnold, Bronte Coates and Marisa Pintado. I’m so grateful to Wai Chim, Nina Kenwood, Robert Newton and Lili Wilkinson for taking the time to read my book and support a fellow writer.

I have worked at the independent bookshop Readings for more years than I can count, and I couldn’t have a writing career at all without the understanding and friendship of my wonderful colleagues, all of whom absolutely believe in the power of books and can deliver carb-loading and amateur psychotherapy in the same session.

Thank you to the amazing team at Text; they’re a passionate, hard-working and professional bunch and I’m so fortunate to have them championing my work. I’m extremely grateful to Imogen Stubbs for designing such a gorgeous and fitting cover. Special thanks to my editor Samantha Forge for her calm manner, excellent insights and careful attention. Thank you to Vanessa Lanaway for her meticulous proofreading.