He’d dived around the tree so fast, my instinct had been to grab his ear with my spare hand as he reappeared on the other side. But before you call the pet protection squad, I did slide my fingers down into his collar.

The problem now is that the tree is the filling in a dog and Rosie sandwich, and I daren’t let go.

If I let go of his collar, and a squirrel coughs or a leaf moves, he might take off again and I’ll end up with my face mashed against my saviour tree, or have my other arm ripped out of its socket. Not good.

But no way am I letting go of the end of the leash and risking him shaking free of his collar. I am taking my duties seriously. Losing my first dog within an hour of taking charge of him will see me blacklisted, or blackballed, or something. Nobody will ever let me borrow their doggie again. Though to be honest that sounds like the most brilliant thing ever right now.

Oh God, what am I going to do? I close my eyes, bang my forehead against the bark and regret it. ‘Think, Rosie, think!’

‘Is this a new game, here we go round the mulberry bush with dogs?’

My knees go all wobbly as the familiar deep voice tinged with laughter breaks through my head-banging reverie, and it is not because he is looking more gorgeous than ever (I can only squint at him out of one eye anyway, as the other side of my face is squashed against the tree), it is because I am about to be rescued!

‘Oh my God, I am so pleased you’re here!’

Before I can object, Noah leans in so close his breath fans my neck and sends goose bumps down my arms and sets up a quiver in the base of my stomach. ‘Wow, I knew you’d be a quick learner, flattery will get you everywhere!’

I fight the groan that is threatening to break out. This is terrible. I am stuck; I can’t back off or wriggle out of reach. I am stuck between a tree and a dangerous place! People will think we are lovers!

‘You’re already getting the hang of this,’ luckily he backs off slightly and I breathe again, ‘and we’ve not even started. Top marks for that. Let me just make a note.’

‘Don’t you dare make notes!’ I scream as he reaches for a notepad in his back pocket. ‘Just rescue me!’ He doesn’t seem to appreciate the urgency of the situation here.

‘Straight on to lesson 2, Rosie, my girl.’ He kisses me on the cheek whilst I can’t escape. With the exertion and embarrassment, I didn’t think it was possible for my cheeks to heat up anymore, but I think they just have. ‘Great to see you again.’

There is something wrong here. The whole Hugo thing has left me weak at the knees. I am not going to be weak and feeble; I am not going to beg. I am also not going to kick him in the shin.