“Sometimes. Wives would send packages to their husbands and we would all get the hookup,” he said.

I wondered if anyone sent him packages, but I didn’t ask. It was my turn to laugh now, but I didn’t. If I wanted to connect with this guy, to find out who he was, I needed to take the first step. Stop deflecting. Build a bridge. Find some common ground and all that.

“You know,” I started, “my dad always came back acting like he just got home from Survivor. It was kind of a joke in our house. Not that it was funny.” I was so bad at this. I was overthinking every single word that came out of my mouth.

“It’s fine.” He smiled, obviously amused by my ramblings, and looked me straight in the eye. “Honestly, Karina. It’s fine. You’re fine.”

I kept going, more relaxed now—more reassured. “He would crave the weirdest things and eat Taco Bell for a week straight after coming home.”

Kael nodded slowly, sucking on his lips. “How many times has he gone?”

“Four.”

“Wow.” Kael blew out a breath. “I’m over here complaining about two,” he said, laughing weakly.

“That’s a lot, though. And you’re my age. I’m over here complaining about zero.”

“Did you ever think about joining?”

I shook my head so quickly.

“The Army? Nope. No way. Austin and I always said we wouldn’t.”

I sounded like one of those twins you read about in sappy books where they make lifelong promises to each other. One lives in the shadows and the other has to live out their twin’s legacy. I didn’t want to think about which role I played in that saga.

“Why not? Just not your thing?” Kael asked.

“I don’t know,” I started. Careful, Karina, I warned myself. I didn’t want to offend him, but my mouth was known for spitting out words without my brain’s approval. “We agreed on it one day. I don’t remember what even triggered it. My dad was deep into his third deployment and . . .”

I could picture the smoke as it billowed through the hallways. I smelled the fire before I saw it.

“And my mom made . . . well, let’s say she made a mess in the living room. A charred mess.”

Kael looked at me, puzzled.

“She said it was from a glue gun, like for crafts? But it was a cigarette. She fell asleep on the couch with a lit cigarette in her hand and had barely woken up when I came rushing down the stairs to find the room filled with smoke. It was crazy.”