And keep in mind, we’re—we’re not business-minded,

I mean I’m a doctor, I give out flu shots; Jerry, our treasurer, runs a

local telemarketing firm, and

we have

no prior experience running something on this scale,

this church, you understand, it’s a massive corporation, and

for the past several years while the church was in debt, that was scary,

for sure, and in the middle of it all, when Agnes got caught on
the church escalator, got her leg all cut up, turns out the board of
directors was personally liable, and we had to get lawyers—we’re
in the position where we do have our necks on the line in a way
that you don’t. You understand.

PASTOR

I do.

ELDER

But at same time, we had a congregation that was here every Sunday
and was growing, exponentially and so
slowly but surely, the place got paid off.

I worry, yes, I do worry, a little, about what happens when you tell a congregation that they don’t need to believe—then I have to wonder if that makes them feel like going to church isn’t so important.

PASTOR

So would you have me threaten them—?

ELDER

no

PASTOR

would you have me tell them that if they don’t come to church,
they’re going to Hell—?

ELDER

no

PASTOR

would you have me tell them that if they don’t tithe every week,
they’ll burn—?

ELDER

oh no of course not

PASTOR

then what would you have me say
that I’m not already saying?

(The Choir sings Song #4, abruptly ending the scene.)

(At the end of the song …)

(JENNY, a Congregant and a member of the Choir, steps forward and takes a mic.)

(She looks to PASTOR and says …)

CONGREGANT

Pastor Paul, I’d like to give a testimonial

PASTOR

(To CONGREGANT.)

thank you sister Jenny

CONGREGANT

I’m gonna read if that’s okay

PASTOR

that’s fine.

CONGREGANT

(Reads from a piece of paper.)

Pastor Paul.

Sister Elizabeth.

I really wanna just thank both of you.

You two have been such a blessing to me and my family,
which right now,

consists really of just me and my son, Donny.

Over the past seven or so years you and this church family
has been there with me through some pretty tough times.

When I got divorced, you and your associate pastors
counseled with me.

And when my husband refused to pay alimony,
you helped us get food stamps.

You let us use the church clothing bin,

so that my son would have new clothes to wear

when school starts in the fall.

And when I feel sad and like I’m gonna collapse,
it does something for me to walk into this building.

There’s a spirit in the building that is really something special,
like the spirit of God is in this place,

and it makes me feel like I can go on one more day.

It’s been really great to sit here and listen to the testimonials that church
members have delivered in response to your sermon.