‘Yes, Leon told me that you both have a lot on your plate at the moment.’

‘Sorry . . . what?’ I question, sure I misheard her.

‘Er, Leon . . .’ she says, hesitantly. ‘He . . . he told me about the concert this weekend and—’

‘You’ve spoken to my husband?’ I say shrilly.

‘I’m sorry, I thought you knew.’

‘What are you doing speaking to Leon?’

‘Well, I . . . I just thought . . .’

‘You thought what?’ I ask, struggling for breath.

‘I . . . just wanted to test the waters without burning my bridges,’ she says. ‘I wanted to gauge the situation. I needed to know if you hated me, or still missed me.’ Her voice cracks, but I can’t afford to get caught up in the emotion of it all.

‘So you thought you’d track him down and speak to him first?’

‘Yes,’ she says. ‘And when he said that you’d spent weeks scouring the subway, a month crying when I didn’t show up at the airport, and that you cuddled my pink rabbit whenever you felt down, I knew it was a risk worth taking.’

My blood runs cold at the thought of my own husband telling my intimate secrets to a woman he doesn’t know. How could he do that when he doesn’t even know the full story? Why would he betray my trust, risk our marriage on something he knows so little about?

But whose fault is that? asks a voice inside my head. Perhaps if you’d been honest at the very beginning, he would have been more honest with you.

‘I’m sorry, I can’t do this,’ I say, as the deceit burrows under my skin.

Though whether it’s mine or his, I can’t tell any more.

25

Leon is sitting on a stool with his head in his hands on the kitchen worktop when I get back to the house.

‘You need to start talking,’ I say, throwing my bag onto the counter. It takes all my resolve not to launch myself at him. ‘What the hell do you think you’re doing talking to my sister, without speaking to me first? You had no right to do that.’

He puffs out his cheeks, looking visibly relieved. ‘You honestly think that’s our biggest problem right now?’

‘I don’t know,’ I shout. ‘You tell me. All this stuff happens – Jacob goes missing, my estranged sister turns up, I’m under suspicion for something I know nothing about, and all the while, you’ – I jab a finger aggressively in his direction – ‘you’re right slam dunk in the middle of it all.’

‘I thought I was doing the right thing,’ he says quietly. ‘You call her name out in your sleep; she’s obviously on your mind all the time, so when she got in touch with me, I wasn’t going to turn her away because that’s not what you would have wanted me to do.’