The bird gave a squawk of surprise. Its talons slipped off me. And I started to fall at accelerating speed to earth, which, now I was normal-sized again, was capable of killing me. I was also completely naked, as I’d forgotten to wish my clothes would grow with me.

‘I wish I was ten centimetres again!’ I got the wish out just before I hit the lawn. So I didn’t do myself any serious damage, but it was an uncomfortable landing. Now I was tiny again, each blade of grass was about thigh-high, and as thick as my hand. It also felt very hard and coarse – more like reeds than grass.

This was turning out to be a stressful day.

I wished for my clothes back. I also wished that the bird would have a really bad headache for the rest of the day. A bit spiteful, maybe. But after all, that was nothing compared to what it would’ve done to me.

Evan had watched all this from the roof, and now he jumped down beside me on the lawn.

‘Wow, that was close!’

‘Tell me about it.’

‘That was a sparrowhawk! They’re quite rare round here, you know.’

‘They can’t be too rare for me.’

‘But you have to admit, they’re magnificent birds.’

‘What?’

‘They’re magnificent birds.’

‘You wouldn’t say that if one had just carried you off.’

‘Yes I would.’

‘No you wouldn’t.’

‘Yes I would.’

‘All right then, let’s see. I wish a sparrowhawk would come along and carry Evan off.’

Down it swooped. Evan’s face as he was carried off, dangling from its talons, featured three big circles – his round, astonished eyes and his round, gaping mouth.

It sounds mean, I know. It’s just . . . when it’s so easy to wish for something and you know it’ll come true straight away, you often find yourself wishing for stuff before you’ve really thought it through.

In no time Evan was a speck in the distance. I wished the bird would bring him back unharmed and put him down on the ground beside me. So it came winging its way back, and as Evan came into focus I saw that now his face wasn’t defined by three circles but by three straight lines. His eyes were narrowed and his lips were set in a line of crossness.

‘Do you still think it’s a magnificent bird, then?’ I asked him.

‘Yes, it’s magnificent. But you’re not!’ His face was flushed and he was panting slightly. ‘Look!’ He pulled up his shirt to show big red weals where the talons had gripped him.

‘All right then, I wish those red marks were gone.’ At once Evan’s skin was back to its pale, unmarked, flabby normality. ‘Happy now?’

‘Not really.’

‘Well, what else can I do?’

‘You could try saying sorry.’