Back The Big Question
Chapters (16)
  1. Cover
  2. Colophon Page
  3. ALSO BY CHUCK BARRIS
  4. Copyright
  5. Dedication
  6. Epigraph
  7. I
  8. II
  9. III
  10. IV
  11. V
  12. VI
  13. VII
  14. Author’s Note
  15. Acknowledgments
  16. About the Author

“What happened, Evelyn? Why are you here? I thought they’d kill you.”

“They didn’t.”

“I can see that, Evelyn, but why didn’t they?”

“They said I was an itch.”

“You are, Evelyn.”

“The kidnapper said I was really annoying and that I got on his nerves something awful.”

“You can do that, Evelyn.”

“I know. Anyway, it seems the kidnapper couldn’t get rid of me fast enough. He even drove me here.”

“I love you, Evelyn Lounge.”

“Evelyn Lounge Durch. I love you too, Arthur.”

Father Daniel Patrick Brady also left the NBC building. He walked through the crowds to the street, ignoring the “Way to go, Father” and the “Too bad, Padre” salutations he heard from the screaming crowd that lined the building’s entrance.

The priest took a right in the street and walked west on Forty-ninth Street until he could get back onto the pavement. He continued down to the corner of Forty-ninth Street and Avenue of the Americas. He stood on the corner waiting for the red light to turn green.

Only he didn’t wait.

He stepped off the curb and into the street in front of an M5 bus.

VI

After the commercial break…

After the commercial break, host Rip Puckett said, “And now let’s meet our three contestants for Game Two. First, a high school graduate who couldn’t afford to go to college. She’s now twenty years old and has high hopes of using tonight’s winnings to set up a college scholarship fund for underprivileged high school students. Please welcome Miss Retta Mae Wagons!”

Retta Mae Wagons walked across the stage to join host Puckett. Her face had a tense expression and she didn’t seem to know what to do with her arms. She folded them over her chest, then uncrossed them and let them hang by her sides, then crossed them over her chest again. And so on.

Rip Puckett, attempting to show what a warm and kindly fellow he was, put his arm around Retta Mae’s shoulders and said, “There, there, honey. There’s nothing to worry about. You’ll be just fine.”

Retta Mae shrugged his arm off her shoulders and stepped back.

Rip Puckett’s expression signified to one and all that Retta Mae’s gesture had rattled him again. After withdrawing his arm, Rip stared at it as if it were diseased.

“You going to just stand there and look at your arm all night, Mr. Host?” asked Retta Mae Wagons with a sardonic smile playing around her lips.

“Ah…what? No! No. Okay…so, Retta Mae Wagons, what are you planning on doing with all that money…if you win, that is?”

“I’m going to set up a foundation to help poor high school kids go to college, like you said in my introduction.”