‘Let’s not get into that now, Mum. I’m over it. Family’s too important … I’ve had trouble getting my head around the whole thing, which is why I haven’t rung before … I just didn’t know what to say, didn’t want to hear the details. Which was mean, I know, and I’m sorry.’ Connie heard Caitlin take a deep breath. ‘Anyway, enough’s enough. We have to find a way to get Dad back onside in the new year. I’m not going through another Christmas like this one. Ever.’

Connie held her breath, overjoyed at her daughter’s words. ‘Do you think he might come round?’

‘All I know is that he’s totally lost without you. I mean, what’s he going to do? Be stubborn and stay on his own for the rest of his life because he won’t forgive you one lapse? After God knows how many years of marriage?’

‘I really hurt him.’

Her daughter fell silent. ‘I know,’ she said. ‘But you’ve apologized. We have to move on.’ Her tone was tough, unequivocal, as only Caitlin could be.

‘I love you so much …’ Connie couldn’t hold her tears a moment longer.

‘Love you, too, Mum. Don’t cry … please. You’ll set me off.’

Connie felt Caitlin’s love threading the silence that followed, like a warm hug. Her heart ached with the joy of it.

After they’d said their goodbyes – Caitlin promising to be in touch as soon as they were back from Manchester – Connie cradled the phone in her hand, in a daze. Hope, she realized, was the most agonizing thing. It was as if she’d been singeing her skin over a naked flame, hoping to speak to her beloved daughter. Now she felt weak with relief. And suddenly starving hungry.

The pie was delicious. Connie ate as if she hadn’t for a month. She polished off the olives, the salami, gulped down the remains of the wine. Still not satisfied, she dug out crackers from one of Tessa’s tins and layered them with some Kentish goat’s cheese she found in the fridge. Finally, she sat back, replete.

It’s going to be all right, she told herself, channelling her daughter’s resolve. But having Caitlin and Ash onside was only half the battle. Facing Devan … She had no illusions on that score. Trust, which she’d always taken so much for granted in their marriage, had been blown out of the water. It might be a long, long time before Jared no longer cast his shadow.

31

Holding little Bash in her arms was heaven. Connie closed her eyes and breathed in his familiar smell. But the hug she valued above all others was Caitlin’s. It was fierce and protective, and like a long, cool drink in a burning desert. The two women clung to each other for a full minute.