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Back The Actresses Save as PDF
Chapters (51)
  1. Cover
  2. THE ACTRESSES
  3. About The Actresses
  4. Contents
  5. Dedication
  6. Epigraph
  7. 1
  8. 2
  9. 3
  10. 4
  11. 5
  12. 6
  13. 7
  14. 8
  15. 9
  16. 10
  17. 11
  18. 12
  19. 13
  20. 14
  21. 15
  22. 16
  23. 17
  24. 18
  25. 19
  26. 20
  27. 21
  28. 22
  29. 23
  30. 24
  31. 25
  32. 26
  33. 27
  34. 28
  35. 29
  36. 30
  37. 31
  38. 32
  39. 33
  40. 34
  41. 35
  42. 36
  43. 37
  44. 38
  45. 39
  46. 40
  47. 41
  48. About Barbara Ewing
  49. Also by Barbara Ewing
  50. An Invitation from the Publisher
  51. Copyright

But when Molly’s mother had finally, after threatening all her life, surprised them all and committed suicide four years ago, Molly nearly had a nervous breakdown – would have had a nervous breakdown if it hadn’t been for Banjo. Not the actual act, committed at last: Molly had died of fright too many times in her childhood, come home too often calling, nervously, Mum?; dreamed too often of finding her mother hanging from the ceiling or lying in the bath.

But because she had realised that she could be a parent at last – and it was too late. She was literally too old. And in her heart that she held now, as she rocked at her desk, she knew that Banjo would have to have children, to be happy. That’s why the notes they left each other didn’t say any longer their old words from years ago I love you I love you I love you will you marry me...? but only the sadder, bleaker I love you I love you I love you...

Soft laughter came through the door from the sitting room, Banjo’s gentle music seeped in under the door like a potion.

Molly rocked and rocked, and held her heart in her hands.

Anthony had phoned her yesterday. He asked her to go to Stratford-upon-Avon one night next week, see Othello, then go to dinner afterwards and talk about the job he wanted her to know about.

‘It’s absolutely urgent that we should meet,’ he had said. ‘This is the chance of a lifetime for both of us. Come down Molly darling, come and stay.’

She had said she would phone back. She knew what he was asking.

Molly rocked and rocked.

*

In the night Banjo turned to her, talking in his sleep. She felt a fierce sexual longing, so strong it woke her completely. She pulled him to her, clasped him to her. Banjo stroked her gently in his sleep, snoring slightly.

Next morning she phoned Anthony and said she would come to Stratford.

13

It was early, just past eight in the morning, hardly anybody in view, when Harry passed the headstone of John Angus Trade in the cemetery.

Last night, because he’d of course finally told them about the Aids test, Emmy Lou and Franny had taken him out to dinner. They’d all drunk a great deal and gossiped a great deal. Franny’s laugh had echoed around the restaurant, louder and louder as if to shut out thinking. Safer guests had turned away.