“Drunk. Don’t give me that excuse. I see the way you look at him. You’ve always hated him being with anyone else, because you never wanted anyone else to have him. Admit it.”

My face grew hot. “No, I—”

Her gaze trailed past me. I looked over my shoulder. Kane stood behind us. Had he heard that? Shaking my head, I dodged Kane’s worried looks and stalked back into the theater, where I could disguise my tears.

I cried quietly to myself through the rest of the movie, until the end credits rolled.

Thursday, February 28

Kane bailed on a ride home, and a ride into school the next day, so I now have this irrational feeling he’s avoiding me. Maybe it’s because of my talk with Luisa.

If you want to know who killed Declan, look in the mirror. She’s insane, of course. Jealous, because I had Declan and Kane.

Or at least I thought I did.

The next time I see Kane, it’s in the science hallway. He has his tongue down Luisa’s throat, which only makes me feel more alone. Guess the whole “breakup” isn’t really happening.

All yesterday and this morning, I’ve been replaying Luisa’s words in my head. She said that I hounded Declan. She thinks I failed him. That I’m responsible for his death. And I don’t even know what I did.

I have to know. Even if Kane thinks I won’t like what I find out. It can’t be worse than not knowing.

When I get back home after school, I can’t bother with my trig homework. I reach under my bed and pull out the box of stuff from Declan’s room. Since my parents are at work, I bring it downstairs, setting it on the coffee table, then open the flaps. This time, I dig through the entire box, pulling out ticket stubs from movies and concerts we’d gone to, napkins, matchbooks, toothpicks, all the junk that signified our life together. He’d piled them all in the top drawer of the dresser in his bedroom. I find the one for that cheesy horror movie. The last movie we’d seen in the theaters, and he hadn’t even really been with me. He’d sat next to Luisa and Kane, while I’d sat alone.

Then I notice a stub for another movie. It’s a romantic comedy, a movie I know I’ve never seen. My eyes scan the date. January 16 of last year. A midnight showing, one month before his death.

I stare at it. Declan liked romantic movies about as much as the next guy. Basically, he stomached them for me. But he’d gone to this movie…alone?

Declan often liked to be alone with his thoughts. Still, I couldn’t imagine him spending much contemplative time at a midnight showing of a Reese Witherspoon flick.