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Chapters (33)
  1. Cover
  2. Title Page
  3. Dedication
  4. Prologue 2005
  5. One 2005
  6. Two 1985
  7. Three 2005
  8. Four 1985
  9. Five 2005
  10. Six 1985
  11. Seven 2005
  12. Eight 1985
  13. Nine 2005
  14. Ten 1985
  15. Eleven 2005
  16. Twelve 1985
  17. Thirteen 2005
  18. Fourteen 1985
  19. Fifteen 2005
  20. Sixteen 1985
  21. Seventeen 2005
  22. Eighteen 1985
  23. Nineteen 2005
  24. Twenty 1985
  25. Twenty-One 2005
  26. Twenty-Two 1985
  27. Twenty-Three 2005
  28. Twenty-Four 1985
  29. Twenty-Five 2005
  30. Epilogue 2005
  31. Acknowledgements
  32. Author’s Note
  33. About the Author

‘Oh, I’m booking a dance with you tomorrow!’ she said, out of breath and going for her drink, while Tony continued to shake his hips to the beat.

James couldn’t take his eyes off his cousin.

The music played on while each of them retreated. First, Aunty Doris, settling herself down from a rare burst of laughter, tousling her son’s hair as she passed; followed by Uncle Bill, who mumbled about ‘last night of freedom’ before they both disappeared into the silent bedroom off the hallway.

Tony danced himself between the cane lounges and mumbled that he was going to call Leanne from his father’s office.

Mum sank into one of the chairs and started flicking through a magazine, bouncing her leg to the music. When the record player clicked off, she stretched and smiled, neatened things up a bit, and sleepily wished James goodnight.

He moved to one of the servery stools, flicked on the television and yanked the volume around so it barely registered. Just enough to obliterate Tony’s telephone mumblings.

Still hungry, James went to the pantry to find the bread bin and chomped obliviously on crusts, then sat down to watch an old movie.

He must have fallen asleep, because it was Tony who woke him by squeezing his shoulder. James sat up and wiped the saliva from the side of his mouth.

‘They all gone to bed?’ Tony said.

James nodded and swallowed.

His cousin’s eyes darted to the hallway and back to James. ‘Right,’ Tony said, hesitating. There was no sense of the impromptu party about him, only the slight whiff of booze, like when Dad had been drinking.

‘Well...’ Tony said, sounding like Uncle Bill. ‘Sorry about all my aggro this arvo.’

‘It’s okay,’ James said. ‘I never got the chance to ask, how was your buck’s night, before the accident happened?’

‘Oh yeah, alright, actually. Yeah,’ Tony said, jostling one finger in his ear.

They’d run out of small talk. Tony moved for the hallway and disappeared with a furtive glance.

James let him go and listened for the wrenching of taps at the far end of the house. Their familiar sound drew him past his aunt and uncle’s room, the door resolutely shut, then past his mother’s door, slightly ajar but dark inside. Another closed door on the left led to Yvonne’s room and at the far end of the hall the enclosed verandah was a cave of silence in the moonlight.

Tony’s undies greeted him, sitting in the well of his pants on the floor. James shut the door, making enough noise to signal his arrival. A crack left by the open bathroom door glowed, but he wavered on the threshold. Should he make some signal?

‘If you need the loo boyo, just go for it mate,’ Tony said, lathering soap up his front.