James pictured his partner in one of those clubs they hadn’t been to for years, trapped between the edges of the crowd with all the middle-aged guys, yet drawn to the younger ones on the dance floor, shirts coming off. The image appalled and attracted him as much as the beat by the service station. He snorted out a shocked noise, and started to shudder.

‘I can’t tell if you’re laughing or crying.’

‘Dylan, listen to me.’

‘What? Are you okay?’

‘I’m fine,’ James said, and swallowed. He had to say it all now. ‘Dylan, I need you to know I have been faithful to you for all our time together.’

Judging by the sounds, Dylan had moved away from the noise. ‘O-kay,’ he said.

‘I didn’t do anything with anyone,’ James said, ‘but I just went to a beat, by a roadhouse.’

James could imagine his partner’s face pressed into one hand, eyes on the brink of betrayal. He realised he’d been punishing the back of his head against the car headrest.

‘I went to one last night too, at Kippen,’ he said. ‘That’s where it happened.’

‘Where what happened?’

‘There was a bashing. I got away, but I don’t think Tony did, in fact I am fairly certain he didn’t.’

‘What?’

‘I think there’s been at least one murder.’

Dylan took control and started getting loud. ‘Where are you now? Are you safe?’

James looked ahead and behind, along the lonely road. The musty smell of his cousin’s car was competing with the scent of the river on his shoes. He flicked both doors locked. ‘I’m safe,’ he said, which stopped Dylan repeating the question.

‘Okay, that’s the main thing. Now, don’t go sniffing around any more beats. Just let the police know you were threatened. Isn’t your dad a cop?’

‘He is,’ James said, sighing with frustration. ‘They know about the bashings, but they’re not doing anything about it!’.

‘Well, you don’t need to go looking in places like that, just come home.’

‘I didn’t just go looking for evidence, I went because I wanted to be there. I haven’t done anything like that for years. I’m sorry, I feel disgusting,’ James said, trying to hold the sobbing back.

‘Jamie, it’s okay...’

‘Do you still want to marry me?’

Dylan laughed. ‘You don’t get off the hook that easily.’

‘It’s probably the anxiety,’ James said. ‘Maybe I should get more help?’

‘Look, do you remember that conference I went to last year, in Canberra?’

‘Yes.’

‘Well, I could have gone to bed with a guy then. We all got pissed, and he was gorgeous, and things had gone far enough when I put the brakes on, but I wanted to be able to look you in the eye and give you an honest answer to an honest question,’ Dylan said.