His eyes swept the audience, seeking its approval. Although ignorant of the policy he was about to announce, his flock bleated their agreement to what was obviously correct.

‘Sports today are for shiny-toothed heroes, chisel-cheeked with tousled hair and all their limbs. I applaud the paralympics and facilities for the disabled at sporting events around Correctomondo. No run through a city is without its amputees using prosthetic legs, and competitors in wheelchairs. But the question is this: have we gone far enough?’

Like the statesmen that he was, the Leader’s voice became firmer as he spoke.

‘In future, sports will be restricted to the disabled.’

There was an audible murmur from around the hall as members of the audience looked at one another to check that this was indeed a brilliant idea. The Leader smiled a smile of omniscience.

‘For example, only amputees using prosthetic legs will participate in marathons, although there will be an exception for wheelchairs. This will also cause a revolution in the science of prosthetic materials.’

The audience recognised the inspirational insight of the new policy and greeted it with warm applause.

A strong Russian voice rang out from the front row: ‘Madness! Utter madness!’

Although omnipotent, the Leader didn’t know what to do. He shot a worried glance at the uninvited guest before battling on.

‘Education is dear to all our hearts.’

He held his hands to his chest. His audience were with him, he could afford a dramatic pause in which to reflect on his own education. He had wanted to excel but was not a natural student. Everything had to be memorised. Although this was obviously a good method for learning, he had led a student revolt against it. Looking back, he couldn’t remember whether he had done this out of conviction, or as a way to stand out.

‘Learning things by heart isn’t education but a memory test. This is no way to shape the minds of children or early learning developers, ELDs for short, as I prefer to call them.’

He smiled at the modernity of the description: a new buzzword to play with, another way to parry the silly questions of the controversial interviewer.

Teachers imposing views on ELDs is out-dated. It stifles individual initiative. Knowledge is a collective human experience gained by exploration. The internet provides a wealth of information. ELDs are far more adept than their teachers at using it.

‘I believe ELDs should be allowed to roam free, to explore, to experiment and discover new areas and subjects. Teachers should act as facilitators, or crowd controllers if you like, not dogma demons stuffing facts down their throats. It follows that the trauma of exams will be a thing of the past. We shall once and for all lead the Nation into a trouble-free world of free-thinkers. Yes! That’s the way! At One Together, my friends!’

Once again the audience smothered their leader in praise. How could they fail with such embracing care? Stalin slapped his knees, his laughter echoed around the auditorium. Tancredi tried to quieten him; he knew they would soon be in trouble.