I followed Liz to the outdoor couch near her Margaritaville tiki hut. She tucked her legs underneath her and stared at me. The horrible smell from the other night still lingered in the air, and I had to make a conscious choice not to put a hand to my nose.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt. I’m sure you’re in the middle of the bedtime routines. I’ve just been worried about you and wanted to let you know that I’m here to talk if you need an ear,” I said.

“I don’t put them to bed anymore,” she said with a shake of her head.

“The kids?”

She confirmed with a lift of one eyebrow. Liz had always put her kids to bed herself. She was often late to wine nights or dinners because she stayed home to do the task.

“Why not?” I finally asked when she didn’t say anything else.

She ran her tongue around her lips and gave a slight shrug. “I didn’t want to anymore. I told them to put themselves to bed. It’s too boring.”

“Oh,” I said with a slight nod. “Well, it is. It’s just always been something that’s been important to you, which goes back to why I stopped by. You’ve been acting a little different lately, and I just wanted to check in.”

She gave a small snort before she slowly looked over her shoulder, toward the back corner of the fence, where the She Shed construction had started. I couldn’t see much in the darkness, other than the outline of the wood.

She turned back to me, and I saw Liz. The old Liz. The sweet friend who always remembered birthdays and checked in on the anniversary of my sister’s death.

“I’m having a tough time,” she said. Her eyes filled with tears, and I leaned forward and put my hand on her knee.

“What’s going on? You don’t have to tell me, but you can if you want to.” I felt a tightening in my chest as I squeezed her knee. My anxiety about coming over disappeared, and shame and guilt entered. I had waited too long to reach out, to see if I could help. Liz would have been over to my house with a basket full of muffins and a fluffy blanket if she thought something was off with me.

She met my eyes, and I saw hers were full of fear before she buried her face in her hands.

“I don’t know. I don’t feel like myself anymore. It’s like there’s this other person inside of me.” She sobbed quietly into her hands.