Nate looks away and it feels like cruel and unusual punishment, like someone is squeezing my heart with an enormous pair of pliers just to see me squirm and cry. It takes him forever to turn back to me. “So what did you do? What the fu—Why did you send those emails?” His voice is hard, but I can feel the worry and uncertainty in each word.

“You really think I’d sacrifice my dignity for a job?” I pause, weighing how much to say. “It wasn’t like that. I never spoke to Simon after that night. I didn’t send any of those emails.”

His face twists, like he’s caught between believing me and listening to what his brain is telling him, what those cops are saying I did. “Then who sent them? And the pics.” His head shakes. “You barely wanted to send them to me, and you just dump them in that dude’s inbox?”

I tuck my chin against my chest, my eyes suddenly burning.

I told myself I wouldn’t cry. I told myself I wouldn’t let any of this get to me. I told myself to be strong. But seeing Nate look at me like I’m a stranger breaks me into a thousand pieces. Nate’s never been wary of me. He’s never talked to me in this tone. He’s never looked at me like...like...this.

I get it. I look guilty. Those emails...the photos...the cyanide in the apartment. It looks like I plotted and murdered a man I was obsessed with.

If I were those cops, I’d suspect me too.

If I was Nate, I’d have questions too.

I’ve done nothing wrong, but guilt and shame slump my shoulders like weight on my back anyway. I wish I could erase the betrayal from Nate’s eyes, but it’s as alive there as much as it is in his voice.

When I speak, my voice is low, but fierce. “Nate, I didn’t kill anybody.” My voice breaks, and then I’m crying. “This had to be Taylor. She—”

“Taylor?”

“She said it. At the party. I told you, when I was upstairs, I heard—”

“Did you? Or were you just saying that so I’d cover you if you got caught?”

“What? No.” A tear slides down my face. “Nate. I know it’s hard to look at me right now, but please. Just listen.” I drag a hand across my face. “If this wasn’t her plan all along, then why was I able to talk her into paying my tuition?”

That makes Nate take a moment and think. He runs a tense hand over his hair. “I believe you, but...you’ve been acting different ever since I took you to that party.”