But her voice sounds like she’s singing. Her eyes are an endless blue. And she smells like autumn sunshine.

I’m not sure I want to forget her.

I swallow the pizza. “And who are you?”

We’re sitting so close that Miles’s leg is touching mine. He’s looking at me as if he hopes to find something in my face. His eyes scan every inch of my skin.

I’ve never talked to Miles, but whenever I go to meet Sky at work, I watch him from a distance.

Miles stands out, not because he’s good-looking, but because he doesn’t seem to want to be. It’s as if his looks torment him somehow. And that’s something I recognize.

Boys like to check me out, and it drives me crazy. Andreas is the last boy I kissed, and I really did like him. But after our kiss, I heard him bragging about it like I wasn’t even a person, just some “hot” girl.

Sky’s handsome too, but his rough-and-tough exterior scares a lot of people off. Which seems like a great idea to me.

At home, I sometimes stare at myself in the mirror. I don’t dare get a tattoo, but how about a piercing? Once I put a dot on the side of my nose with a Sharpie. The thought of a stud in my nose instantly made me feel stronger.

“And who are you?” asks Miles.

“Alissa.”

“Are you gay?” Sky asks.

I get why the teachers say he’s direct. He’s like a bulldozer sometimes.

Miles shakes his head irritably. “No, I’m not gay.”

Sky lights his cigarette. “No need to get pissed. Gay people are cool.”

Miles puts the last bit of pizza into his mouth and stands up. “Got to go.”

Is he leaving because Sky asked that question? I realize that I’m riled up. I want Miles to look at me again the way he just did. It was like he could see much more than my exterior.

“Sky’s paying for the pizza,” I say. “And the tip.”

I curse to myself.

Alissa likes him.

I thought this was just about a bet, but Alissa smiled at Miles the way only she can. Her boy-slaying smile.

When I get home, I turn the amp for my electric drum kit up high. Drumming always works, but not this time. Even after playing for half an hour, I still feel angry. I pull off my headphones.

Why can’t I shake it off?

Alissa doesn’t have a clue that I only started dating Caitlin to divert attention.

Caitlin’s in our year at school. If I squint, they even look a bit like each other. But Caitlin’s blue eyes don’t match up to the real thing.