Lobby

Fender

Claus.

She once mentioned him in passing.

They went on a few dates, but he liked her more than she liked him.

They lost touch.

I thought.

She said he didn’t matter.

So how did he get her diary?

“Rules of the game?” Lucas spits out the words. “Has he gone totally insane? You’re not going to listen to this, are you?”

“Calm down,” says Kate.

“Calm down?” Lucas shrieks. “Why would I do that?”

“Because…” Kate pauses. “For Fender.”

I look up. Everyone is staring at me. Even Linnea.

Stupid Fender, who was being cheated on and didn’t realize.

Stupid Fender, who thought he was the only guy for her.

Stupid Fender, who thought the worst thing that could happen to him was reading her letter.

“I…I’m just going to my room for a while.”

“I’ll go with you.” Lucas is already heading off into the hallway, but I shake my head.

“I want to be alone for a bit.”

Lucas exchanges a quick look with Kate.

“Honestly,” I add. “I’ll see you later.”

Without waiting for an answer, I escape into the hallway.

Our room is still intact, but it feels as wrecked as the girls’ room. I can’t see the luxury anymore. It’s like a thick layer of dust is lying over it.

I place the diary page in front of me on the bed and stare at the words.

This time I turned my face away.

That sentence keeps repeating itself inside my head.

What did she mean by this time?

They saw each other the night before Kate’s party, exactly a year ago now.

What happened then?

Why is Claus sending us these messages?

Maybe Lucas is right and Claus is trying to drive me crazy.

Because I had something he would never have: her.

I frantically think back to the night before Kate’s birthday. I was so enthusiastic about her plans for the weekend. We were going to camp in the woods just outside town. Kate had arranged for two double tents and a big supply of food and drink.

I couldn’t wait to be lying inside the same tent as her, close together.

Should I have noticed then that something was wrong?

Was I so blinded by my feelings for her that I didn’t realize she was worried about something?

Could I have seen Claus when I cycled away? He was probably already standing in the bushes, waiting for me to leave.

I drive my nails into my palms. I want to find that boy and thump him in the face. I want to hurt Claus as much with my fists as he’s hurt me with his messages.

I want…