Patrick recognised that, on one level, Michael was speaking the truth. He was chasing after nothing. But he just couldn’t stop himself. He hated that his daughter had let herself down so much and that, at the same time, she had let him down, shamed him in the worst way possible. He blamed Carmel. She was a fucking disgrace, she had failed him miserably. She was another trollop, another user. It was a family trait, by all accounts, and his daughters had not inherited it from him. That’s if they were his daughters, of course. He was wondering about that now. He couldn’t eat or sleep. His whole life was consumed with thinking about his daughters, the lives they had led, and his complete ignorance of it all. He couldn’t believe that he had been so naïve. He had always told his girls how lovely they were, how beautiful they were; he had treated them like princesses, totally convinced of their goodness. He had assumed they understood the importance of decency, had cherished their virginity, known the value of self-respect. But that had been a complete fucking myth on his part. They had apparently lain down for anyone who gave them the time of day. He had never once even suspected them of anything untoward. Now he could only wonder what else he had missed, what else had been going on beneath his nose. Every day he was finding it harder to believe they were his flesh and blood.

Even Declan and Michael were suspect to him now. He had given them the same trust, and now he could only wonder at his own foolishness. His Carmel was the most suspect, as far as he was concerned. She had been in charge of the girls after all. Now he was constantly reminded of Carmel’s past. She had hardly been a wilting fucking virgin when he had met her, but she had been much younger than him, and she had pursued him with a fucking vengeance until she got him. He had happily signed on for life, for a family and a home. She had supplied the family, he had supplied everything else. He had given her and his girls everything that money could buy, contentedly settled down with Carmel, and he had never once given her cause to doubt him or his loyalty. But could he really say the same about her? He wasn’t so sure any more.